SubscribeStar Story: The Road Trip, Parts 1-35

Part One

“Come on, Annie!”

“No.”

“Please? Please, please, please?!”

God, she was whiny! For a girl who physically looked like an older version of me, Kate certainly didn’t act the part. Around our parents, she was a cute and innocent angel. At school, she was a popular girl and a total flirt. Around me, she was an obnoxious brat. You’d think turning eighteen would have made her grow up a little, but this wasn’t much different than the way she operated in middle school. Being a total social chameleon. When it came to me, her older sister, she had a whole lifetime of us being related to figure out my buttons and how to push them. Kate usually combated my stubbornness and maturity with her own stubbornness and immaturity, begging and whining and pleading until she got her way.

The worst part was, it almost always worked. Most of the time, just to get her to shut up.

But not this time. “No, Kate.” I sternly said, crossing my arms to show just how serious I was. The pose probably worked a lot better back when I was taller than her. Still, I was determined to show her that this wasn’t happening.

“God, Annie, you’re so boring! It’s not like anyone will know. Can’t you just be fun? Like, for once in your life?”

I just rolled my eyes in response. Our definitions of ‘fun’ rarely aligned. Especially in this instance, as embarrassing me would clearly be one sided in terms of who was having a good time.

Pull-ups.

That was Kate’s SUPER FUN idea. One minute, we were shopping for snacks at the rest stop. The next, her eyes were lighting up and she was grabbing a pack of disposable underwear off one of the shelves we were walking past. She giggled and gushed over how the light pink reminded her of some of the underwear I used to wear when we were kids, and how these would totally fit me despite the packaging saying ‘Ages 8-12,’ and that I should try them on just for fun.

I was nineteen years old, a year and a half older than my sister. However, puberty really fucked me over. Seventh grade was my first and last growth spurt. 5’0 and 3/4. I didn’t even break 5’1, as I was constantly reminded by the penciled growth chart back at our house in one of the doorways. My hips and chest existed, but really only enough to identify me as a girl. So yes, pull-ups sized for tweens would probably fit my twig frame, which is exactly why there was no way in hell I’d give Kate the satisfaction.

“Nope, I’m going to keep being boring,” I shrugged. It would be pointless trying to explain to my sister that I was fun in my own way, plus leaning into her attempt at an insult was the best way to dismiss her, “Come on. We still have to get drinks.”

“Ugh, Annie! It’s a dare. You have to do it. How about $10? Or $50, for the whole ride!” she smiled, trying to haggle when I clearly didn’t even want to meet her at the table. I was about to roll my eyes and walk away, until she threw out something she knew would be enticing, “I might even consider not calling you ‘Annie’ for the rest of the trip.”

Fuck.

She knew she had me.

While I was cursed by puberty, Kate was blessed. She caught up to me when she was thirteen, and now had a full five inches on me at eighteen years old. Curves that put mine to shame; a perfect hourglass figure. And the worst part? She didn’t even try. No sports, no workouts, no diets, nothing. At first, I was just a little jealous, but that jealousy ended up turning into constant frustration about my size thanks to how my sister constantly had fun with it.

Ever since her growth spurt, Kate had gone out of her way to make me look like her younger sister. Not quite bullying, but close enough. Little patronizing comments here and there, random hair tugs and hip checks, and only ever calling me ‘Annie.’ Nothing overt or malicious. Just that small, knowing smile, as she knew full well that I couldn’t make a big deal about an offhand comment that no one else around us batted an eye at. And, since I was the older sister, I would end up looking like the bad guy if I snapped at her.

The worst part was, a handful of people had taken to the name ‘Annie,’ despite how it had never been a nickname of mine before, even when growing up. One or two boys at my home church, most of her high school friends, and even one of MY friends once at our graduation party, just due to the repetition of Kate saying it whenever my friends were over. The girl apologized immediately and corrected herself, of course, but the damage was done. Kate was ‘winning,’ simply by being casually persistent.

Going into this trip, I expected Kate to call me ‘Annie’ all weekend long in an attempt to get our cousins, and maybe aunt and uncle, to pick up the nickname. If she poisoned the waters like that, who knows how the nickname might circle throughout our extended family? Which is exactly why her offer was so tempting. Especially after two semesters of college, where people actually called me what I wanted to be called.

Rather than dismiss her again, I hesitated. Apparently that was enough to tell her that I was on board. “Yay!” she squealed, grinning and handing me the pack of pink pull-ups, “Meet me at the checkout counter. I’ll grab the drinks!”

And, just like that, she was skipping away.

Part Two

I hadn’t even agreed to anything yet! But there I was, standing alone in the rest stop aisle with the babyish underwear she was so eager to make me wear. Sighing to myself, I made my way to the front of the store. Thank God this was on a road trip, far away from our home city. I could still feel my cheeks flush a tiny bit at the thought of someone seeing me holding such an embarrassing item, but I’d probably be a lot more paranoid if there was a risk of being seen by someone I knew. Logically, I knew that the average person would assume I was buying them for a younger girl, but the knowledge that Kate wanted ME to put them on made it impossible to fight apprehension with logic.

A minute later, Kate appeared from a nearby aisle. Before, she just had a small box of crackers for us to share. Now, she was holding several bags of candy and a large variety pack of Gatorade. Yeah, we had four hours left on the drive, but we also just had lunch. Whatever.

“Ready to checkout, Annelise?” Kate asked. It was actually kind of weird hearing my full name in her voice after so long, even with the exaggerated tone. She beamed at the sight of me still holding the pack of pull-ups. Before I could change my mind, Kate strutted right up to the counter and placed her items down, plucking the pack from my hands and adding it to the pile.

I watched in nervous silence as the checkout girl scanned the items one by one. The pull-ups were first, as Kate had placed them on top, and now I’d have to go through the trouble of getting the girl to remove them from the order if I wanted to bail. It would just be a series of clicks on the computer, but it was still always a little awkward to interrupt an otherwise smooth transaction. I half expected Kate to turn to me and say that she ‘forgot’ her wallet, a constant move she’d use in order to get me to pay for all kinds of things. She would pay me back, most of the time, but only after a lot of reminders. Apparently her excitement about this little dare was enough for her to forego that little song and dance, as she immediately pulled out her credit card and paid for everything.

The moment the chip was successfully read, Kate grabbed her card and stashed it away. Then she picked up the underwear pack and handed it to me again. “Meet me in the bathroom, Annelise.” She grabbed the drinks and snacks and headed for the exit to put everything else in the car. Meanwhile, I retreated into one of the aisles when I realized what my sister just said right in front of the teenage girl across the counter and what it would imply.

Despite the embarrassing absurdity of this dare, and my gut instinct telling me to simply put the recently purchased pull-ups on any nearby shelf and walk away, I found myself listening to my sister’s parting words and finding the bathrooms in the back corner of the rest stop store.

Was this worth it? Kate already called me ‘Annelise’ twice, and I hated that it was actually working. Offering me something that should never have been taken away from me to begin with. Taking a breath, I realized that I only had so much time until Kate returned. Then I would lose that precious solitude that a road trip rarely offered. I had to weigh the pros and cons while I had the chance.

My sister wasn’t wrong. No one would know. It’s not like she was asking me to put on an outfit piece that would exaggerate my unfortunate size. Plus I was wearing a skirt, which would hide any bulk from the pull-ups. And, if I went along with this, then she would use my full name around our extended family. Certainly a pro.

But, if I went along with it, Kate would know. My dignity would definitely take a hit, no matter how innocent and fun she pretended a dare like this was. And would we be stopping again? As awful as being called ‘Annie’ was, my sister blurting out “Annelise is wearing PULL-UPS” would be much worse. And/or just pulling my skirt down or up for the visual. I definitely wouldn’t put it past her, which means that I’d have to change back before we arrived to avoid the risk. Or just go commando, I guess, since I could always just pull the underwear off and shove it in my backpack before getting out of the car.

Most importantly, what mattered more? Giving Kate the satisfaction of me willingly putting something this embarrassing on, or more or less ‘allowing’ her to fuck up my name all weekend long?

Thirty seconds later, when I saw Kate walking back from the car after stashing away her snacks, I knew I had to make a decision. The pros and cons flashed across my mind as she entered the rest stop store again and meandered through the aisles until she joined me by the private restrooms. Ugh, and she was drinking from a lemon-lime Gatorade. In my opinion, every other flavor was better, especially the red and orange ones. As usual, Kate and I had nothing in common as sisters.

“Well, Annelise?” she said, “Ready to put on your pull-ups?”

Part Three

The mature college school girl within me was screaming ‘NO.’

I’m nineteen. Way too old and way too mature to be wearing something so childish. Especially since it was Kate’s dare, and nothing good ever comes from letting my younger sister have her way. But my self conscious side was pushing back against the voice of reason. I already wore heels and slightly padded bras to enhance my otherwise petite body, as well as clever make-up and perfect hair for as many mature features as possible. Being called ‘Annie’ really undermined that, especially since my red hair made it too easy for people to compare me to the freckled orphan from the musical.

Yes, pull-ups were obviously beyond immature as well, but it was different. They’d be hidden. No one would actually know, as long as I was careful and as long as Kate didn’t do anything to screw me over. The name ‘Annie,’ however, wouldn’t be hidden in the slightest. I’d have to deal with it all weekend long, and it was easy to imagine my younger cousins latching onto the nickname. Still. I wasn’t exactly enthused about the way my sister called them MY pull-ups, and there wasn’t exactly a lot of trust when it came to the girl.

“Kate, do you promise not to tell anyone?” I asked. Thinking quickly, I added the other option, “Or show anyone?” Lifting my skirt would be difficult to prevent on my end, no matter how guarded I stayed. I still planned on taking them off before arriving, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t expose me to our parents on the way.

Kate gasped. She had the most exaggerated expression of shock and surprise all over her face, which almost earned her another eye roll from me. “An-ne-lise,” she said, enunciating each syllable, “What kind of sister do you think I am?” Kate held up three fingers as she settled back into a more nonchalant smile, “Your secret is safe with me. Scout’s honor.”

“You dropped out of Girl Scouts in 4th grade.”

“So? Once a Girl Scout, always a Girl Scout!”

“I’m serious, Kate. You can’t say a word. To anyone.”

“I won’t. But you have to wear them for the whole drive, sis. No changing until we’re out of the car, okay?”

I internally cursed at that little stipulation. It would be a lot more difficult to discreetly remove them between the car and our relatives’ house. That made it more of a risk if Kate decided to go back on her word and embarrass me, but I could still dart to the bathroom the moment we arrived. It’s common enough to need that kind of break after a long drive, and I could do a quick swap before visiting with anyone.

“Promise me, Kate.” I looked her dead in the eyes. I’m the older sister. Even if I have to look up in order to keep eye contact, I can still be serious. “You’ll call me ‘Annelise’ for the whole weekend.” Echoing her tone, wanting to be sure it wasn’t going to be one of those things where we made a deal without actually making a deal. I needed to hear her say it. And, while Kate was a lot of things, the two of us did take our promises pretty seriously.

She gazed down at me for a second, then glanced away in thought. In retrospect, her hesitation should have made me call things off right then and there. In classic teenage fashion, my sister was trying to think of a promise that wasn’t so cut and dry. And I was letting her, simply by not speaking up. “I promise to call you ‘Annie’ while you’re wearing your pull-ups,” Kate said, with a wink. Moving right on, she continued, “And yes, Annelise. When your dare is over and you’re back in your big girl underwear, I promise to call you Annelise all weekend.”

Unbelievable. That meant she was going to call me Annie for the whole drive! And after just giving me a taste of my preferred name again. Nothing was ever easy or straightforward with her. “Kate, no,” I said. It was important to put my foot down when it came to her antics, especially when I was already doing something so demeaning. “That wasn’t the deal.”

“It’s too late, Annelise,” Kate said, “Unless you’re saying I should break a promise?”

FUCK.

She immediately put me in an impossible position. As the older sister, I’ve lectured her about the importance of keeping her word. Leave it to Kate to twist that into making a promise in a way that binds her to something that works to her advantage. “That’s not-” I began. “You can’t-” Ugh! I couldn’t even find the words.

But Kate could. “Your choice, Annelise. But choose quickly. Mom and Dad are going to wonder what’s taking us so long.” She stepped over to the private bathroom and pulled the door open for me to enter if I wanted to. “Pull-ups and ‘Annie,’ or ‘Annie’ all weekend?”

The time pressure just made everything worse. Part of me still knew this was a terrible idea, but I was also falling victim to the ‘logic’ of her conditions. Kate was already regularly calling me ‘Annie’ these days. She had been doing so for months, and for the first half of the drive as well. What was another few hours? The only reason that it stung was because I had been given false hope. I also noted that she was still calling me ‘Annelise’ at the moment, which aligned with her promise. She would only call me the annoying name once the pull-ups were on.

One little dare. Just a few hours in embarrassing underwear, and then I could have a normal weekend where I wasn’t cringing at Kate’s name for me and constantly correcting her around our cousins.

“Kate. Promise me.” I took one step towards the bathroom. That’s it. Showing her I was game, but not wanting to cave without some assurances. “You won’t tell anyone. You won’t touch my skirt. This stays between us.”

“Where’s the trust, sis?” Kate giggled, “But fine. I promise I won’t tell anyone about your pull-ups. I promise I won’t touch your skirt. Happy?”

Not quite. “You promise this stays between us?”

“Jesus, Annelise. It’s just a sister’s dare. Yes. I promise it stays between us. Now, stop stalling and put your pull-ups on.

They’re not MY pull-ups!!! If we weren’t in public, I might’ve yelled just that. Instead, I merely scowled and walked into the bathroom. Kate’s annoyed tone already made me feel a little bit judged. At this point, it was best to just get it over with and pretend that I wasn’t bothered by the embarrassing underwear.

Unfortunately, I didn’t get the privacy I was hoping for. Rather than closing the door behind me, Kate followed me into the bathroom.

Part Four

“Kate, what are you doing?”

“Making sure you do your dare! What, would you rather lift your skirt to prove it outside?”

“No, but-” I began, trailing off. As usual, my sister had a way of making it sound like she was right. There were plenty of reasons why I shouldn’t have to do what she was suggesting, but none of them came to mind. The visual of lifting my skirt in public, showing off pull-ups that I was now wearing, was enough to give me pause. That, and arguing would no doubt just draw this process out.

As always, the best option was to just act like none of this bothered me.

Resisting the urge to sigh, I opened the pack of pull-ups. Knowing that any hesitation would only result in potential teasing, I wasted no time taking one of the bulky pairs out. The light pink made me reflexively cringe, as I had given up the color years ago. For a redhead my size, pink wasn’t the most flattering color. Thankfully, the childish underwear would be under my skirt. Unfolding the pull-up, vaguely familiar with the material from my babysitting days, I adjusted my weight so I could step into the first leg hole without inadvertently flashing my sister.

“Annelise, what are you doing?” Kate asked.

“What does it look like I’m doing?” I was actually a bit surprised she interrupted, considering how I could still change my mind at any second. I definitely caught how quickly she turned my question around on me.

She just sighed. “You don’t wear pull-ups over regular underwear. What if you have an accident? That would be a total nightmare to deal with!”

“Why does it matter? It’s just a stupid dare.”

“Then do your stupid dare properly. Otherwise, it doesn’t count.”

For a few long moments, I just stared Kate down. Was she really going to insist on this? It was bad enough that I was letting her watch me put on pull-ups, but low key stripping in front of my sister was uncomfortable too. That same small voice in the back of my head was telling me to just throw the recently purchased underwear into the bathroom trash can and walk away, but I was mentally committed now that we had circled around promises and deals for so long already.

Without much bravado, I simply reached under my skirt to get a decent grip on my underwear. The entire time, I kept a close eye on Kate, still suspicious that she might try to catch some of this on camera. She didn’t, thankfully, and it didn’t take long for me to tug my panties down my slim thighs. It was wearing a boring white pair of underwear, and I was immediately tempted to explain to my fashionable sister that I had only chosen such a set since we were on the way to visit our cousins; the last place nice underwear really mattered.

Kate didn’t tease me, surprisingly, though I guess she was already pushing her luck with everything else. I let the underwear drop to my ankles and I stepped out of the leg holes as gracefully as I could manage; not only was the light breeze underneath my skirt embarrassing, but I also didn’t exactly know what to do with the underwear now in my hand. Putting them in my purse seemed a little gross, so I ultimately decided to tuck them into the open pack of pull-ups.

“Happy?” I muttered.

“Now put on your pull-ups, Annelise,” she simply said in response.

Now that we weren’t in public any more, I could be more vocal about my distaste for that particular phrase. “They’re not mine, Kate.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, sis. Did we buy them for someone else? Or did we buy them for you?”

“You know what I mean.”

As usual, it wasn’t worth trying to deal with my younger sister’s ‘logic.’ Instead, the best play at this point was to just get it over with. Letting Kate get a rise out of me would only enable her. Her size advantage and her teasing would always bother me; I just had to get better at not letting it show.

Taking the partially unfolded pull-up I had temporarily set aside, I got to work. Trying my very hardest to pretend Kate wasn’t watching me with an amused grin, I stepped one foot after another into the leg holes. ‘Please don’t fit, please don’t fit.’ I quietly prayed as I slid the childish underwear up my legs. They were designed for tweens, and I was a nineteen year old college girl. Admittedly, my legs were pretty twig-like and my lower curves were even less impressive than the upper ones, but still. I was an adult.

Then again, what would happen if they didn’t fit? Technically I made an attempt to try them on, which was kind of the dare. But if I couldn’t wear them for the whole car ride, which was definitely Kate’s stipulation in regards to calling me ‘Annelise’ once we arrived, would she claim my efforts didn’t count for anything?

I didn’t have to wonder for too long. When I reached my thighs, the pull-ups didn’t resist in the slightest. Unable to help my blush the farther upwards I went, I soon found the waistband of the padded underwear wrapped snugly around my hips. When I felt the slight bulk between my thighs, and the padding against my ass, I was immediately tempted to just yank the embarrassing thing all the way back down my legs. But if it was sunk cost fallacy before, I was definitely in too deep at this point. There was no way I was going to give Kate the satisfaction of putting on pull-ups and letting her screw up my name on purpose because I bailed so soon.

“Well? Do they fit?” Kate asked. She gazed at me with curiosity as I removed my hands from underneath my skirt and adjusted my outfit to make sure nothing looked out of place after changing underwear. My expression must have said everything, because she smiled widely at my awkward silence, “Oh my God, I knew it!”

“Let’s just go,” I muttered. The longer we were in the gas station bathroom, the more strongly I’d consider just calling this whole thing off.

“Not yet,” she said. She grabbed the pack of pull-ups and pulled out another one. Holding it out with an expectant expression, she explained herself when I glanced back in confusion.

“Your dare was to put on pull-ups, Annie. As in, more than one.”

Part Five

Unbelievable.

As if one pull-up wasn’t enough. Ever the one to push her luck, Kate seemed intent on doubling up the bulky underwear that I’d be wearing for the rest of the drive. I knew exactly what she was doing, and yet it was working anyway. Now that I was already wearing one pull-up, I was stuck with the choice of either putting on another one or calling this off and getting nothing for my troubles.

At this point, I was in too deep. What’s an extra layer? Either way, the underwear is embarrassing. It’s not like a second was going to make a difference in that regard.

“Fine.” Not wanting to argue this time around, especially since every minute wasted was going to require some bullshit explanation to our parents who were no doubt impatiently waiting in the car, I just pulled out a second pair from the pack.

Kate just gave me a warm smile. “What a good little sister!”

I just gave her a look, then got to work putting on the second pull-up. Like usual, there wasn’t any point trying to get on her case. If I snapped that I was the older sister, or demanded that she not call me that, it would only enable her. I’d also have to deal with her roundabout logic about how my size somehow makes me younger, or maybe just her classic claim that she was only teasing while telling me to ‘stop freaking out over nothing.’

The second pair of pull-ups slid up my legs just as easily as the first, until they reached the padded underwear already on me. Blushing as I dealt with the bulky resistance, it took a good amount of tugging and squirming to work the double pull-ups into place. It was like trying to put on jeans that were fresh out of the dryer, only worse due to my hands being under my skirt and my sister watching with an amused giggle or two.

I managed to get them fully on, but it was tight. And, worse than the padding that was now so snugly wrapped around me, the bulk between my thighs was more noticeable. I couldn’t fully close my legs. Not the end of the world with a long skirt, but definitely not a sensation I was used to after exclusively wearing mature underwear for so many years.

“Took you long enough, Annie,” Kate said, “Now let’s go. You’re making all of us late.” She tossed the rest of the pull-ups into her purse, ‘just in case,’ then opened the bathroom door for me.

It was now or never. I was either about to walk out into public while wearing pretty much the most embarrassing underwear imaginable, or I was going to panic and call this whole thing off.

Against my more mature instincts, I left the safety of the bathroom in the pink pull-ups Kate dared me to put on for the drive. It was going to be worth it. Now that I had put them on, my younger sister already had new ammo to tease me with. A few more hours wouldn’t make a difference in that regard, so it was better to just suck it up and see this through so I could at least be called ‘Annelise’ for the weekend. Kate may be a brat, but she still kept her promises.

I was hoping to just get in the car and finish the drive as quickly as possible, but of course Kate volunteered us to clean out the trash in the back seat before we got on the road again. There wasn’t anything telling on her face, but I was pretty sure the goal was just to make me walk around in pull-ups for another few minutes. I waited impatiently as she shifted a few of the bags and moved things from here to there in the trunk, and eventually let her hand me a few things to throw away with her.

Just as we reached the bins around the corner, I felt Kate’s hands shifting the waistband of my skirt. “Oh, Annie! Make sure your pull-ups don’t poke out of your skirt,” she said. No boundaries, like usual.

I was about to correct her on my name, before remembering that I had agreed to let her keep calling me the immature nickname as long as this dare was happening. And, while I was tempted to push back on the possessive word yet again, the bigger issue at the moment was my personal space. “Kate, I can do it myself,” I said.

“It’s fine, sis. I’m almost done . . . Wait, Annie! Are you wetting yourself??” Kate gasped.

I barely registered the words as I felt Kate’s fingers slip between my skin and the waistband of the pull-ups. Both my skirt and underwear were swiftly pulled away from my body, and I suddenly felt cold liquid running down my ass less than a second later.

It was like nothing I had ever experienced. The cold drink flowed down my crack and pooled at the base of my ass, but it didn’t continue its journey down my legs. Instead, the innermost pull-up absorbed the liquid and the crinkly material clung to my skin. “Kate!” I exclaimed. Her hand slipped away as quickly as it had arrived, but the damage was done. I spun around to see my sister smirking with her yellow gatorade bottle half empty. “What the actual fuck, Kate?! That isn’t funny!”

Enough was enough. This wasn’t worth the deal; I couldn’t just let Kate push this dare further and further. No way in hell was I about to wear wet pull-ups for a multi-hour drive. Ugh, I was just going to have to strip and wash the sticky drink off myself, and then go commando for the rest of the ride. Going back to the car for my regular underwear first was going to waste more time, and then Kate would have the chance to blame me for our lateness.

“No way, little sis.” Kate took a sideways step to block me from making any progress forward. “Go get in the car, or I tell our parents that you wet your pull-ups.”

Part Six

“Excuse me?”

Kate did not just say that.

“You know I can be convincing, Annie,” she said, with a wink, “And wet, yellow pull-ups will look pretty bad. Do you really think they’ll believe it’s from my drink?”

“No one will believe you, Kate!” I exclaimed. With a roll of my eyes, and an awkward shift of my legs from having to deal with the innermost pull-up clinging to me in a number of places as the Gatorade settled, “I’m nineteen.”

“Most of the time, you look twelve. And I already put the rest of the pull-ups in your duffel bag. You clearly need them 24/7.” Kate’s smirk slowly transformed into a pouting face. “Annie’s been having some issues making it to the bathroom lately. I wanted to tell you, I really did, but she swore me to secrecy before she left for college . . .”

I couldn’t help but drop my jaw for a second; my lips parted in surprise as I took in Kate’s words. She was going to claim I had been wearing pull-ups for almost a year now?? The ‘little sister’ jokes were one thing, but this was crossing a line. Yet I couldn’t help but feel a bit stuck in her story, now that I was realizing that she must have stashed the pull-ups in my bag when she was moving things around in the back seat.

Kate was too good at playing the perfect angel, and I was now wearing wet pull-ups. Or ‘wet, yellow pull-ups,’ in her words. Thanks to my sister’s superior acting, even dry underwear might have been difficult to talk my way out of. But this? It was genius, in a way. Infuriating, and rude, and incredibly frustrating, but annoyingly clever nonetheless. How on earth was I going to be taken seriously at my word when the bulky underwear was wet? Short of convincing my parents to get close and smell the yellowed pull-ups, they would believe Kate instead.

I could run,’ I thought to myself. It was tempting. But Kate might trip me, or grab me, or shout to our parents the moment I tried anything. Plus running with so much padding between my thighs didn’t seem like it would go over well. No. It wasn’t worth it. Once more, I decided to play along. “What do you want?” I asked, glaring at my younger sister.

“Even yourself out first, Annie!” Kate grinned. She held out the half emptied bottle of Gatorade to me, “Pour some in the front.”

I just snatched the drink without a word. Constant glaring, now. I couldn’t believe I let myself get tricked like this! Put on pull-ups? Why on earth had I caved? The incessant nickname would have been better than this. I braced myself for another wave of cold, and pulled the pull-ups away from my frontside. Before I could talk myself out of it, I poured a few drops, wincing as the cool liquid flowed over my most private area. The previously dry patches of the underwear began to cling to my skin as well.

“Happy . . .?” I muttered.

“ALL of it, Annie!”

Letting out another annoyed sigh, I tilted the bottle up and let the rest of the cold Gatorade trickle into the pull-ups. Better to just get it over with, rather than putting up a fight. By the time the bottle was empty, the innermost layer wasn’t just wet; it was soaked. I shivered when I let go of the pull-ups’ waistband and the cold front side stuck to me as well. “Bitch,” I huffed, chucking the empty plastic bottle at Kate.

“Language, sis. And don’t litter,” she said, after stepping aside to avoid being hit, “Pick that up, and recycle it.”

I wanted to scream. She was echoing a phrase or two that I had used over the years as the older sister, and once again in a way where she was ‘right.’ Proper girls don’t swear, littering is bad, and you’re supposed to recycle rather than throwing everything into the garbage. All of that was true, except that it wasn’t supposed to be delivered in such a patronizing way by my younger sister.

While I didn’t want to give her the satisfaction, it also wasn’t in me to leave trash on the ground. With an annoyed huff, I retrieved the empty bottle. The soaked pull-ups shifted all around me as I bent over, and I could feel a blush coming on as I stood back up. “Kate, I’m going to change,” I said. This was already so uncomfortable, not to mention embarrassing. As much as I hated the idea of going back on our deal after doing so much, I was finally figuring out that none of this was worth it.

“No, Annie,” Kate said, “What if you have another accident? We’ll have to keep you in those until the next rest stop, just in case.”

“Kate, you’re not listening!” I groaned.

“No, you aren’t listening, Annie. Are you saying there’s a zero percent chance you’ll wet yourself in the car?”

Your average girl would probably say ‘no.’ But, as a math major, I immediately hesitated at my sister’s question. I should have known better. Letting it be a rhetorical question would have been so easy, but the numbers girl inside of me knew that there’s always the smallest chance of just about anything happening. Obviously, I wasn’t going to wet myself, but I also couldn’t claim that it was impossible.

I had no idea what to say, but apparently my silence was enough. “Exactly,” Kate said. She took my hand and gave a small tug to get me to start walking with her. “Keep your pull-ups on, Annie.”

They’re not- they’re not mine . . .

But I couldn’t even manage that much. Instead, I reluctantly let my younger sister take me back to the car. If I couldn’t think of something to combat her logic quickly, I was going to be sitting in wet pull-ups for the rest of the drive.

Part Seven

Unfortunately, I wasn’t quick enough.

Step by step, Kate walked me all the way back to the car. The soaked underwear didn’t help my mental state, I was constantly distracted by the way the snug pull-ups somehow managed to both cling to me and slightly sag all at the same time. Each step made me cringe in awkwardness, and made it that much more difficult to find the words to change Kate’s mind about this excessive prank.

Rather than thinking of anything to say, however, the only resistance I could muster was yanking my hand out of hers as we approached the car. But it was too late. “We’re ready!” Kate exclaimed as she pulled open the car door. “Sorry that took so long. Annie had a little accident that held us up.”

I could immediately feel the heat rushing to my face at her offhand comment. Like usual, she was blaming me. The ‘innocent younger sister’ act worked all the time, but this was different. There was an embarrassing double meaning in her words. Our parents would obviously hear it as something else, but Kate and I knew exactly what she really meant.

“It’s fine,” our mother said, “Just get in. We’re behind schedule.”

With those words, my fate was sealed.

Amidst her haste to get back on the road, our mother didn’t seem too concerned with whatever ‘accident’ Kate was talking about. Aside from my little blush, I probably looked normal. That was the point about this little dare, as no one was supposed to know what I changed into underneath. But it also didn’t offer me many options for delaying our departure from the rest stop. Not only would cleaning sticky Gatorade off my private areas take forever, but now Kate had the option to follow through on her threat and rat me out if I tried anything.

Knowing Kate, she could probably make them believe her. Not only was she a clever little actress, but wearing soaked pull-ups would easily confirm her story. “Go on, Annie,” Kate said. She gave me a serious look while gesturing to the open car door.

Annie. As if my current underwear situation wasn’t bad enough, I’d have to suffer through that nickname until I could steal away to a bathroom at our cousins’ house and change back to my regular underwear.

Without a word, I shot her a glare and got into the car.

Thankfully, my skirt was long enough that I wasn’t nervous about my movements giving away what I was already sacrificing so much to keep secret. However, the faint crinkling and personal knowledge of what I was wearing was still enough to keep me on edge as I climbed into the back seat of the minivan. It was my preferred spot for road trips, as I usually got some solitude thanks to the distance. I don’t mind socializing with my family, but road trips admittedly make me impatient and a little moody. I’d rather kill time with my phone.

I definitely wasn’t ready for what it was going to be like to sit in the double pull-ups. It was like landing on a cold sponge; all the drink that had sagged down during my walk earlier had slowly soaked into the thick padding. I sharply inhaled from the feeling, trying my best to settle on the wet pillow that was now my underwear. My thighs still couldn’t close completely thanks to the bulk between my legs, so I made sure to adjust my skirt to avoid even the slightest risk of one of our parents looking back and glimpsing the girly pull-ups.

Surprise, surprise, Kate had more in store for me. Rather than sitting in one of the more spacious middle seats like she did for the first leg of the trip, she climbed into the back with me. “I thought you might want some company,” she said. Her words were for our parents, but her little smirk was just for me.

“Thanks,” I muttered. I immediately glanced away to avoid staring right at her cleavage as she kept her body slightly bent as she made her way between the middle seats. It really wasn’t fair. Same red hair, same skin tone, but literally all the height and curves in the family.

“By the way, you look so cute today!” Before finding her seat, Kate reached out and pinched one of my cheeks. Lowering her voice so our parents couldn’t hear, she added, “Your blush matches your pull-ups.” The last word was extra hushed. At least she was following through on her end of the deal.

Still, I couldn’t help but worry about the chance of her being overheard. “Kate, sit down.” I quickly swatted her hand off my face, still averting my gaze as much as possible while her boobs were more or less right in my face. It was less about jealousy, and way more about the fact that she was my sister. The last thing I wanted to see up close was her cleavage in a tight tank top. Just to hurry her up, I echoed what our mother said, loudly enough for the parents to hear. “We’re behind schedule.”

Kate just rolled her eyes. “So serious, little sis. You really need to loosen up.” Pinching down a little harder on my cheek, she finally let go and plopped down across from me in the back. “We’re ready!” she said.

I avoided the temptation to rub my cheek, not wanting to give her the satisfaction.

Just like that, we were pulling out of the rest stop and back onto the highway. The blue-roofed building left my view in a matter of seconds, as did any possible chance of calling this whole thing off. I was going to be stuck in wet pull-ups for hours.

Turning to me with her lips pursed in a triumphant smile, no doubt thinking the same thing, Kate got right to business. She wouldn’t have joined me in the back for no reason, after all.

“Hey, Annie,” she said, “Can I give you a make-over?”

Part Eight

Kate hadn’t given me a make-over in years.

We used to do each others’ hair and make-up all the time when we were younger, before we started drifting apart in our teenage years. I was all academics and extracurriculars. Kate was the total opposite. Naturally, we were both content to do our own thing when we had separate rooms, reverse personalities, and typical teenage angst on top of all that. We didn’t fight or anything; it was easy to coexist, and not all sisters end up close.

But then her stupid growth spurt broke the pattern. Little by little, Kate found ways to have fun at my expense. This road trip included. I should have known that putting on those pull-ups was a terrible idea. My biggest concern, however, was keeping them a secret. I had no idea that she would pull a stunt like that with her drink. And, now that my guard was up, of course I didn’t trust her with my hair or my face. Especially not with the amused smile plastered on her face.

“No, thanks,” I said.

Did she have to come back here? Sitting in soaked pull-ups was bad enough. The least Kate could do was give me a little peace and quiet for the rest of the drive. Or not.

Kate pouted at my reply, ever the chameleon, and said, “Please, Annie? We haven’t done that in, like, forever! This is supposed to be a family trip, isn’t it? And you’re just glued to your phone.”

As if she wasn’t texting and watching videos for the entire first leg of the drive too. But she’s the golden child and perfect angel, despite me being the one with better grades and currently attending a prestigious university. And her reply was loud enough to carry over the music and up to the front seats. “Kate is right,” our mother said. She glanced over her shoulder in the passenger seat. I immediately fidgeted with my skirt, tugging it a little farther over my thighs. “Might as well spend some time with your sister while you can. She missed you a lot this last year!”

Sure, she did. Or she pouted about it to earn some pity points while I was away.

But I couldn’t accuse her of that. Or of anything, for that matter. Aside from her best friend, I’m probably the only other person who knows my sister well enough to see through her little act. Our mother wouldn’t believe me in the slightest if I suggested that Kate was doing anything but trying to bond with her sister. And, as usual, subtly making me look bad in the process.

Seeing through the act didn’t necessarily prepare me to handle it. “I missed her too,” I said, lying. Like most undergrad first-years, the freedom of living away from home for the first time in eighteen years outweighed the occasional emotion that came from the distance. Besides, there were plenty of other ways that Kate and I could ‘bond’ without her messing up my ensemble. “But I already did my make-up today. And my hair,” I added, just in case.

“So?” Kate replied, “You’d look so much cuter if you let me braid it. And you could use a touch-up here and there too.” Vaguely gesturing to my face, she kept up the innocent smile while our mother was still involved in the conversation. When I didn’t reply right away, Kate huffed and frowned. “See? She never wants to do anything fun.”

“Come on, Annelise,” our mother said, “What’s the harm?”

She took Kate’s side. Shocker.

The harm is that undoing a braid isn’t as simple as just taking off the hair tie. My long red hair can be a mess sometimes, which is why I have a morning routine to make sure it’s tangle-free to start the day. Even if Kate just stuck with the simple three strand braid, there was a good chance I’d be stuck wearing it until I had the chance to shower.

If I answered that way, then I’d essentially be saying ‘I don’t plan on keeping the braid Kate gives me.’ Just two weeks after getting home from my first year at college, I was stuck in the same trap as I often found myself in during my younger teenage years whenever our parents were dragged into things. Damned if I do; damned if I don’t. Let Kate ruin my pretty hairstyle before we visit our cousins for the first time in nearly a decade, or make myself look bad in front of our parents by refusing something that was objectively simple and ‘harmless.’

I hated to give an inch, but it was better than bluntly saying ‘no.’ So, against my better judgment, I asked, “What kind of braid?” It’s not like I’m opposed to putting my hair up. But Kate said ‘cute,’ an adjective I detest for obvious reasons. That, paired with my current guarded mindset, and I’d prefer to know what my sister had in mind before committing to anything.

Her answer was so classic, I really should have seen it coming. “Annie, that would ruin the surprise!” Kate said, “Don’t worry, you’ll love it. You trust me, right?”

Nope. Not in the slightest. “Of course I do. I just don’t like surprises.”

“Well, there’s a first time for everything. Maybe you’ll like surprises after this, and it will all be thanks to your amazing little sister.”

“Or you could just tell me.”

It was a losing battle, as usual. Our mother’s chuckle at Kate’s latest overconfident reply showed that she was more on my sister’s side than mine. I was still resisting, but I could already see the outcome: I was going to let Kate style my hair for me, because I would rather cave than look like the difficult, whining teenager I used to be framed as when Kate cleverly pushed enough of my buttons.

Kate knew it, too. “Nope, that’s no fun,” she giggled, “Go on, Annie, turn around. It’s time for your make-over!”

Part Nine

A make-over. From my sister.

I knew it was a terrible idea, but I had already agreed. At least, agreed enough for Kate to interpret the decision as fully made. Just like with the pull-ups.

And, with our mother now involved in the conversation, I felt even more pressure to just go along with it. As for convincing myself, I justified things with the fact that I could always demand a different braid if I hated the first one, or do a simple three-strand myself. My fate was sealed in terms of being unable to wear my hair down for the rest of the day, but at least there was still room to overrule Kate’s choice.

At this point, any annoyed huff or comment would just make me look bad. I was supposed to be the mature college girl. So, without dignifying Kate’s presumptuous instruction with a response, I merely shifted in my seat and turned to look out the window. The simple movement was enough to remind me about the wet pull-ups; the thick, wet sponge underneath my ass and between my thighs was bad enough when I was sitting still, but moving around just made it worse. Biting my lip to avoid making an awkward sound in response to the sensation, I merely tried my best to sit still and check out the surroundings as we drove down the freeway.

Kate was quick to unbuckle and scoot over to the middle seat. Did she get in trouble for being unsafe? Not at all. Maybe she had waited until our mother had returned to whatever she had been doing in the front seat, or maybe Kate just assumed she could get away with it either way. Regardless, it didn’t take long for her to begin running her fingers through my hair.

“Maybe I should grow my hair out like this,” Kate said. She had rocked shoulder length hair for the longest time, while I preferred keeping mine longer. Brushing through my red locks over and over, I finally flinched when she hit a small tangle at some point. Of course, she hushed me immediately. “Relax, Annie. I know what I’m doing.”

“Just- be careful,” I muttered. Remembering our ‘deal,’ there wasn’t anything I could say about the nickname like I normally might.

My response only earned me a teasing tug on a few strands of hair that were very much not tangled. This time, I knew she was trying to bait me with her physical response to my words. I still flinched from the unpleasant feeling on my scalp, but otherwise remained quiet. A few seconds later, when she finally seemed satisfied with the straightness of my hair that was literally thanks to how much time I spend making sure it’s that way every morning, she began separating out a few strands to braid.

At first, I had no clue what she was doing. Without a mirror, I could only work with how things felt. Rather than getting to work right away, Kate merely used my shoulders and her fingers to keep separate a few sections out on either side. Nothing familiar yet, though I also wasn’t particularly versed in this kind of hair styling. I still didn’t trust her very much after that stunt she pulled earlier, but I felt committed at this point.

Finally, she actually started working on my hair. I felt the familiar pressure of a tight braid on the left side of my head, and once again resisted the urge to complain about it. Kate’s response was so predictable, it wasn’t worth trying to start an argument. Braids are supposed to be tight; otherwise, they won’t hold. Or something like that. One of those things that was objectively true on the surface, but easy to overdo if your older sister was the cure to your boredom on a road trip.

It was only after Kate started working on my right side that I realized what she was doing. “Kate, stop!” I quickly exclaimed. Pigtails?! Unless I was grossly mistaken, that’s what it felt like. I recognized the feeling from when I wore them many, many years ago. It was a cute style when I was a kid, and certainly lined up with that very same adjective that my sister used a minute ago. Except, as a girl who always strives to offset her physical shortcomings, I was very much against something like this. “Do something else with my hair, okay?”

“Annie, we’ve been over this,” Kate sighed. Not pausing her braiding process in the slightest, she said, “I know what I’m doing, and you need to relax.”

“But-”

“No ‘but’s,’ little sis. Trust me, this is going to be a super cute look for you! Now hold still, okay?”

I did as I was told, but only because any further arguments or attempts to squirm away would be fruitless. At this point, I was buckled in, and stuck between my sister and the window. It’s not like there was anywhere to go, and I might end up hurting my own hair if I did something that went against the way Kate was pulling. So, for the moment, I begrudgingly accepted the childish hairstyle I was getting. Going back to my original plan, I’d just have to undo things after it was all said and done.

A minute later, I felt the same tightness on my right side as Kate mirrored the red pigtail that was already done. After tying it off, she gave both braids a playful tug. “All done, Annie! Now, it’s time for your make-up.”

As if. This make-over was yet another bad idea that I let myself get talked into, and there was no way I’d allow Kate to ruin my mature make-up too. I turned to look at her, ready to say as much, but I was not at all prepared for what came next.

Part Ten

With no warning whatsoever, Kate’s hand starfished squarely over my face.

Not just her bare palm and fingers, either. It could only be a make-up wipe she was using, as I immediately recognized the texture and the dampness. Before I could flinch or slap her hand away, she gave a quick but firm circular wipe all the way around my face. Forehead, cheek, lips, and other cheek. I could only attempt to sputter out a protest in response, as my lips kept getting nudged and then squarely covered by the wet wipe.

I thought that would be the end of it, but then she began focusing on the cheek she ended up at. She managed to get a few rough scrubs in before I managed to shove her hand away while wincing at how aggressively she was wiping at my face. “KATE.” I shot a death glare at her, not even wanting to imagine how the incomplete removal made my face look.

The bigger problem was the fact that there was a reason I took so long with my routine in the morning. Along with my short stature and all around lack of curves, there was a third feature I had that contributed to my youthful appearance–my freckles. Pair that with red hair, and I could be mistaken for a tween if my outfit was too casual. It used to happen all the time at restaurants and the movies before I made a more conscious effort in the morning to mitigate those things I was most self conscious about. While my outfit was still intact, mostly, Kate had just undone my perfect hair and make-up in a matter of minutes. I’d have to remove the rest of my make-up just to not look ridiculous after she started the process, and my personal things were in a duffel bag at the bottom of the trunk.

“What?” she asked, playing innocent save for the way her lips were pursed in a small smile. I couldn’t tell if the act was on the off chance our parents heard my exclamation over the radio now playing through the front speakers, or just to piss me off. Both, I suppose.

“You know what.” I bluntly replied. She knew full well how much I hated my freckles. Her skin was fairly clear in comparison, save for a handful of her own freckles that worked a lot better with her overall image than they did with mine. Yet another thing to be jealous about, but it definitely paled in comparison to our general size difference.

Kate stayed right next to me in my personal space, curiously tilting her head at my response. It had only dawned on me that she had unbuckled in order to braid my hair. If I was sitting in the car without my seat belt on like that, she would almost certainly tattle on me. Not in the childish way, like yelling it out if we were still kids, but more by feigning worry about my safety; maybe idle speculation about whether or not this is a habit of mine. I had made it through a year of undergrad, yet my sister could still make me nervous in terms of how bad she could make me look to our parents when she wanted to.

Her position also made me feel a little trapped. With the window to my left and Kate to my right, it’s not like I had anywhere to go while the car was traveling down the freeway. “You said I could give you a make-over, Annie,” she said. Technically, true, but I had only ‘agreed’ because I felt pressured to.

Also, did I? Looking back, I’m pretty sure she said I needed a touch-up or something. Not totally removing the make-up that I always work so hard on in the morning in order to hide my freckles. But the damage was done. Even without a mirror nearby, I knew there wasn’t an easy way to undo what my sister’s partial removal had messed up. Hopefully Kate had enough supplies tucked in her backpack under the seat; otherwise, I wouldn’t be able to redo my make-up until I had access to my own belongings. “Just-” I began, suppressing the urge to say something rude, “Give me the wipe. I can do it myself.”

“Nope. Hold still, and close your eyes,” Kate said, with a little smirk, “Trust me, little sis. It’ll be a lot easier if you let me take care of it.”

My eyes immediately narrowed. I hated ‘little sis’ almost more than I hated ‘Annie.’ The patronizing nickname was one thing, but the other phrase actually made the occasional person instantly believe that I was the younger sister. Usually, just a salesgirl at the mall, or a friend of a friend; nothing that would follow me in terms of embarrassment, but still frustrating whenever it happened.

If I wasn’t relying on whatever make-up Kate had lying around, my response would have been a lot more harsh. She was getting way too old to still be pulling shit like this. “Kate, I don’t need your help.”

“Well, duh. You’re a big girl, sometimes. But don’t you want to bond as sisters?”

Sometimes? And there were definitely better phrases than ‘big girl’ to describe what I was, but she was clearly going for the pull-up reference. “Kate, I’m being serious.”

“I’m being serious, too,” she said, with a tiny shrug, “Now, close your eyes.”

This wasn’t getting us anywhere. As usual, I found myself caving and subjecting myself to my younger sister’s games. Either way, my make-up had to be removed. As annoying as it was to let Kate get her way, it was starting to feel easier than bickering around it for another five minutes.

She didn’t hesitate at all.

The moment I gave in, the wet wipe was all over my face. Her movements were a little bit erratic, making me flinch every now and then as she firmly rubbed my lips, circled my eyes, and roughly scrubbed at my cheeks all over again.

And, all the while, I had to hear that quiet giggle every time I reacted.

Part Eleven

My morning beauty routine took, on average, an hour or so.

A thorough shower, styling my hair to perfection, getting my make-up just right, and then finding a great outfit for the day. Granted, today’s combo was just a simple skirt and tank top. I didn’t need to try as hard around family. However, I still wanted to look my age, and Kate managed to ruin an hour’s work in a matter of minutes. My hair was tightly braided into pigtails, and now my freckles were a lot more prominent than they were when my make-up masked most of them and diminished the others.

Little by little, she was stripping away my mature enhancements. Obviously, on purpose. Since I was wearing pull-ups that were soaked by her Gatorade, Kate clearly thought it was amusing to make me appear more like the kind of girl who needed such embarrassing underwear. Childish freckles, juvenile hair, and a frustrating nickname I was about to be reminded of all over again.

“Annie, you look so CUTE.” Kate said. Her tone was friendly, but her lips were slightly curled upward as she scooted back over to her side and casually dropped the used make-up wipe onto the car’s floor. She was always a little messy and careless, in that ‘I’ll deal with it later’ kind of way.

Scowling, I replied, “Now, make-up?”

“Don’t be silly. We’re going to stick with a more natural look today. You’re fine just how you are, sis!”

“No. Kate, you said-”

“I said I’d give you a make-over. And, voila! All done. Just try it out for a while, okay?”

No. No way. I’m well aware of how youthful I look without make-up, because I see myself in the mirror every morning. It’s bad enough with wet hair after a shower. With pigtails? I almost didn’t want to look at the damage, but I couldn’t help it. Curiosity, and all. “Kate, either give me a new braid or I’m doing one myself.” While demanding the redo, I pulled my phone out of my purse to see just how awful the current style was.

Before I could check myself out in selfie mode, however, my phone was plucked right out of my hands. Since I didn’t expect anything like that, my grip hadn’t been particularly tight. “Ah, ah, ah. This is a family trip, Annie. No cell phones!”

“Hey!” I exclaimed. She did not just do that! My phone is personal, which is true of most girls, and seeing it in my sister’s hand was not a pleasant image. “Kate, give it back.” I reflexively reached to take it out of her hands, but got caught halfway on the seat belt from my jerky movement.

“No. You’re acting like a brat, Annie.” Like it was any old trinket, she dropped my phone into her purse. “I’ll give it back once you’ve earned it.”

Kate.” This was over the line. I was in fucking college, and she had barely graduated high school. Our size difference didn’t give her the right to be so overtly patronizing, especially not with my personal possessions in the mix. If I had to give her a lecture as her older sister, so be it. “You can’t-”

This time, it was our mother who interjected. Again. “Annelise. Please keep your voice down.” She had turned around to look at the two of us, and Kate was once again sitting across from me without a hint of a smile on her face. “Is there a problem?”

“Kate-”

“I took her phone,” Kate said. She was confessing? That wasn’t her style. Normally she just acted all coy and innocent about everything. Once again, my time away at college left me unprepared for the way my younger sister developed her manipulative games. “She’s just been on it for, like, the whole drive! Isn’t this supposed to be a family trip?”

Once again, she was echoing our parents’ phrase from over the years. Because apparently, a family trip means even the downtime shouldn’t be spent reading, or on screens, or whatever it is when suddenly we’re expected to be paying attention with no warning. And, just like before, Kate was blaming me for being on my phone too much when she was equally as guilty of doing the exact same thing.

And, as always, she got favorable treatment by playing her cards just right. “Annelise, why don’t you let your sister hold onto your phone for a little while? It’s fine as long as she doesn’t use it, right?”

No, it was not fine. While she was at least touching on the point that my phone should only ever be in my hands, it didn’t change the fact that Kate was going to be allowed to keep it. “No. That’s not fair.” I replied. The moment the words passed through my lips, I could feel a light blush appear on my cheeks. Full of regret at using the same response I used when I was a teenager, I instantly tried to course correct. “I mean-”

“Life’s not fair, sis,” Kate said, “Besides, it’s not a big deal. Just pretend that it’s in your backpack or something.”

“That’s not the same, and you know it.”

“Well, tough. It’s not really your call, is it?”

“Girls,” our mother said, “Be nice.”

“Sorry, Annelise,” Kate said. Ever the little actress, she jumped at the chance to feign maturity about this whole thing. “I’ll give your phone back soon, okay? Let’s just spend a little more time together first.”

Great. If it was just the two of us, I could give her a piece of my mind. But, with our parents listening, I was trapped. Playing nice meant letting Kate have my phone. Arguing would just make me look worse. I barely even had a choice. “Fine,” I muttered, still bitter about this whole thing.

Just like that, we were left alone again.

Lesson learned. The radio doesn’t tune out everything. We can carry a conversation in the back seat just fine without being overhead, until one of us raises our voices. So, moving forward, I would have to avoid snapping at Kate. If it happened again, it would be a pattern, and she would once again make me look like the less mature sister. Unbelievable. I was so ready to get back to school, or perhaps for her to head off to college and grow up a little more.

“So, Annie,” Kate said. Ignoring my narrowed eyes at the continued use of the nickname, she leaned forward to speak a little more quietly, “If you do something fun for me, I’ll give your phone back and leave you alone for the rest of the drive.”

“Oh?” I asked. At this point, I didn’t trust her in the slightest. The rest stop dare led to the soaked padding between my legs, and agreeing to a make-over led to my entire image being messed up. No matter what she was offering in exchange for my phone, I was pretty sure it would be worse than the device being stashed in her purse. And I was right.

With a tiny glance towards the front seat to make sure no one was listening, Kate lowered her voice even more. “You should use your pull-ups.”

“Excuse me?”

“You know. For what they’re designed for.”

She couldn’t possibly be serious. But, when her facial expression didn’t change, I just rolled my eyes and shot back, “Umm, no. How about you give me my phone because it’s fucking mine?”

“Language, Annie. And why not? They’re already wet from your first accident.”

“That wasn’t an accident.”

“So, you did it on purpose?”

I shot her another glare, but couldn’t help but blush again at the insinuation. We were both there, and yet she was trying to change the story? Bullshit. “You know what I mean, Kate. That was your fault. Not mine.”

“Mm hmm. Says the one in wet diapers,” she winked.

“They’re pull-ups,” I hissed back. This time, it was my turn to glance up front to make sure no one overhead what she just said. If she ratted me out after I kept them on and got in the car, I was going to be furious. But also, I was still nervous about what would happen if she did. Kate was a lot more manipulative than I was, and my current underwear situation would look pretty bad.

And she knew it. Fully grinning at my nervous glance, she replied, “Wet pull-ups. Because that makes it so much better?”

“Just drop it, Kate.”

“Or what?”

I had no idea. Being older may have given me leverage back in our tween years and earlier, but not now. We were both technically adults, and I had nothing on her any more.

“That’s what I thought.” Her grin faded into more of a smirk as she looked me over. Pigtails and freckles, courtesy of her. And babyish underwear that was only hidden because of how carefully I was seated. “So, Annie. Let’s talk.”

p

I was really missing the peace and quiet that I had during the first half of the road trip. Almost as much as I missed the feeling of normal underwear between my legs.

And, thanks to the new subject Kate was bringing up, I couldn’t ignore my current predicament. In fact, she was trying to make it worse. Much worse. “So here’s the deal, little sis,” she began. Leaning back in her seat with an idle smile, she attempted to explain. “If you-”

“No.” I immediately cut her off. Kate was out of her fucking mind if she thought I’d even consider something like that. I’d rather let her hold onto my phone for the whole weekend, as much as that would suck. Better than degrading myself with such an embarrassing act. “I’m not wetting-” Once again glancing towards the front, I lowered my voice just in case, “I’m not doing that.”

Kate just rolled her eyes. “Oh my god, Annie. I was kidding.” Was she? It was always difficult to tell when it came to my sister. Either way, I was glad she was moving past it. But, as always, she had something else in mind. “How about this, instead? You haven’t really been hydrating enough today.”

This time, it wasn’t difficult to connect the dots. “And . . .?”

“Drink two bottles of water, and I’ll give your phone back sooner rather than later.”

“What, so I’ll have to pee?”

“So you’ll be a little nervous,” Kate winked, “It’s only two or three more hours, right? I know you’re tiny, but your bladder isn’t that small. You’ll be fine.”

Ignoring the jab about my age, I tried to focus more on the immature suggestion. What was the angle? It’s not like I’d actually wet myself. Worst case scenario, I’d just ask our parents to pull over for a short bathroom break. While they were a little annoyed at how long Kate and I took at the rest stop, my sister and I were both adults at this point. If there was a need to stop, we’d be taken more seriously than when we were kids.

And yet, this was Kate. I definitely didn’t trust her after the stunt she pulled with the Gatorade, not to mention the way she just ruined my hair and make-up. You’d think that I would learn to not play her games, but now she had my phone. Without that, I’d be bored out of my mind for the next few hours.

When will you give it back?” I finally asked. Details first.

“Drink one first,” Kate countered, “So I know you’re serious.”

“Kate-”

“Annie.”

Unbelievable. After two semesters of university, it really shouldn’t have been so easy for my younger sister to get under my skin. But she still knew all the right buttons to push. Every time, I knew that whatever she wanted was a bad idea. And, every time, there was a way where avoiding that thing just led to something more infuriating. Better to face what I knew than to deal with the unknown.

So, without saying a word, I just grabbed the small cooler from underneath my seat.

Retrieving one of the water bottles from inside, I shot Kate another annoyed look when she said I couldn’t just drink it. I had to chug. Not only was I notoriously bad at eating or drinking anything quickly, but it would be doubly as annoying for something like water that was just sitting in ice.

The moment I cracked the lid, replying half-assedly that I’ll do what I can, Kate pulled out her own phone. “You have two minutes, or this doesn’t count for anything.”

“Kate, I’m not-”

“Starting now!”

A smarter girl would have refused. There wasn’t that good of a reason to drink the bottle in the first place, as I was begrudgingly cooperating with her conditional task to begin with. She still hadn’t mentioned what ‘sooner’ meant in regards to my phone, and it would have made a lot more sense to negotiate before drinking anything. Or, at the moment, to at least not let her dictate an additional ‘requirement.’

Except I wasn’t the most level-headed at the moment. I was still dealing with the continued awkwardness of sitting in a soaked pull-up, not to mention the excessive padding between my thighs. Then there was the slight tightness in my hair from the pigtails, the knowledge that I was no longer wearing make-up, and the fact that my phone was sitting in Kate’s purse. Too many awful variables, and the only thing I could realistically undo at the moment was the loss of my phone. Everything else was impossible due to being stuck in the back seat of the car.

So, without giving it much thought, I pressed the water bottle to my lips and began drinking as quickly as I was able. Which, of course, was not that quick. The first few quick swallows already made me wince as the cold water rushed through my throat. Pausing to exhale for a moment, I started round two. After what felt like a painstaking amount of effort, my heart sank when I saw that only a quarter of the bottle was gone. This would be a lot more manageable if it was room temperature; even then, my drinking speed would be questionable.

“Come on, Annie! You can do better than that,” Kate said.

Helpful.

Shooting her an annoyed sideways glance, as she didn’t speak up until the bottle was pressed to my lips again, I took a few more half hearted swigs. I really was trying, but could only barely keep up with the timer. Kate announced the one minute mark, and there was still half the bottle to go.

Determined to make it at this point, more to avoid some bullshit penalty than to prove myself, I tried to pick up the pace.

Apparently, that wasn’t enough for Kate. “Here, Annie. Let me help.”

The bottle was currently tilted up. And, while I was mid-drink, she reached over and gave it a hard squeeze.

p

Part Thirteen

If it was possible, I would have screamed.

The water rushing into my mouth, however, made it impossible to do anything of the sort. I was already holding a bit of water in my cheeks from my weak attempt to chug, which made it take even less time for me to reach capacity when Kate squeezed the bottle. Not only did I simultaneously sputter and spit a little bit out when I couldn’t swallow at the rate the ice water passed my lips, but my brat of a sister also pulled the bottle away to ‘help’ with the problem that she created in the first place. And, since the bottle was still tilted downwards, all the remaining water landed squarely on my chest.

“Mmm!” It’s the only sound I could make at the moment. Wincing not only at the cold, but also the fact that I could feel the water seeping into my bra, I instinctively slapped the bottle away. It was way too late for that, as the plastic was more or less empty when it fell from Kate’s hand and hit the floor.

Aside from half-heartedly stifling a giggle, Kate didn’t even try to appear sorry. She dramatically pouted for a second, before the expression morphed into a tiny smirk. “Annie, you’re so clumsy!” she said. Picking up her phone and snapping a quick picture, she added, “And accident-prone.”

The double meaning would obviously be lost on our parents if they happened to overhear, but I immediately understood. Simultaneously glaring and blushing, I had to force down the anger that was welling up. If I went off on her, I’d once again look like the bad guy. The older sister, berating the younger one, when it would be so easy for her to feign innocence and act like I must have spilled because of a bump in the road or something.

“Delete that.” I said. Settling on something that was perhaps a little more under my control, I urged her to get rid of the embarrassing photo. It was way less about the fact that my top was now wet, and more about the freckles and pigtails that added layers of immaturity to my look.

We were old enough that Kate wouldn’t just post it on social media for the fun of it, but letting her hold onto it would still be a bad idea. I could already envision her showing friends when I was one room over, or even just showing it to me in a ‘Remember this?’ kind of way. All the young features I normally tried to hide, easily on display.

“Hmm . . .” Kate mused. It didn’t take long for her little smile to return, “Okay. But only if you use your pull-ups.”

Of all the-

“Kate. No.”

She was unbelievable. I was nineteen years old. How could she even suggest something like that with a straight face? It was ridiculous.

And yet, she still seemed determined to take things further than just yellow Gatorade. “What? They’re already wet. I’ll delete the photo AND you can have your phone back.”

“You’re giving my phone back the second I finish that second bottle.”

“But, Annie, you didn’t technically finish the first one. Soooo, that means you still have two to go.”

It took another conscious effort to not raise my voice. “No. That was your fault, Kate. Not mine. You have to give it back.”

“I don’t have to do anything,” Kate said with a tiny eye roll, “I don’t take orders from little sisters in wet pull-ups. As far as I’m concerned, you lost your phone privileges, and you just made a total mess. Now, I can help out with a thing or two if you ask nicely, but you’re on your own if you keep acting like a brat.”

After a nervous glance towards the front to make sure no one overheard Kate mentioning the underwear I definitely shouldn’t have her to convince me into, I got back into things.

Arguing with Kate never went well. She never fought fair, and it was always impossible to win against a girl who never seemed to take the conversation seriously to begin with. Since I was starting from a place of weakness, and wanting something from her, there was no easy way to convince her to do anything; not even as her older sister.

She had my phone and an embarrassing picture of me. I had pull-ups and wet clothes. No matter how much we circled around, Kate more or less was saying the same thing. By the end of it, she had even added a condition that wasn’t even part of the conversation to begin with. I had two choices–use my pull-ups, or chug two more water bottles and take off my bra as well. According to her, it was important to let my undergarment dry instead of keeping it against my skin for the rest of the drive after spilling water all over my chest.

My duffel bag was too buried in the trunk for me to reach back and grab myself a change of clothes and, despite my discomfort, I couldn’t bring myself to ask our parents to pull over again. It had barely been thirty minutes since the last rest stop, and my sister and I already took long enough the first time around. There were so many lesser evils, it was difficult to figure out what the best move was.

And, of course, there was one other little detail–

I stuffed my bras.

pa

Part Fourteen

Drink a bunch of water and take off my padded bra? Or wet myself, as a nineteen year old girl.

Little by little, Kate had set things up in a way where it felt like those were my only two options. The obvious answer was ‘neither,’ but I was caught in a situation where it really felt like I had to choose. She was holding onto my phone at the moment, and there was also the secret of the Gatorade-yellowed pull-ups I was stuck in. The only way to get things back to normal and avoid any more embarrassment was to dig myself a little deeper first.

My younger sister really was an artist. For all her little taunts and threats, she never actually blackmailed me or forced me to do anything. It tended to feel that way in the moment, but that was never really the case. It was knowing smiles, and pointed suggestions, and framing things in a way that nudged me onto the path that she wanted me to take. But at the end of the day, everything was my choice. At any given moment, I could have stood my ground and said ‘no.’ But I didn’t. Instead, I reluctantly played her game.

“I’ll drink the water,” I mumbled. Ugh, two full bottles? I was going to feel so bloated for the rest of the day. Even though a good amount of the first bottle ended up spilling all over me, I had at least chugged half of it before Kate got impatient.

“And?” Kate asked. Speaking of knowing looks . . .

Feeling committed to option one, as the second was absolutely not going to happen, I agreed to the rest. A small part of me had hoped that maybe she’d be happy with my partial acceptance, but that clearly was the case. “I’ll take off my bra.” Did I really just say that?! It was one thing to mentally accept that I was going to go through with it, but saying it out loud was something else entirely. Aside from the embarrassment, I was also sealing my fate. It wasn’t a promise, which would have carried more weight, but it could still be twisted into me ‘giving my word’ and then trying to backpedal.

Now that I had agreed to her terms, Kate jumped right on it. “Okay, bra first.” After a second of gauging my reaction, she explained, “What? Annie, it’s wet. It’s healthier for your skin if we take care of it right away.”

“My tank top is wet, too. So, by your logic, I should be topless.”

“Actually, yeah. That would be best. Well, changing would be best, but too bad. Look, your tank top will dry a lot more quickly than your bra. I should know; I was a Girl Scout!”

“For all of three minutes. Kate, I don’t think-”

“Come on, sis. Bra off!”

If it were anybody else, I would have outright refused. Thanks to having a younger sister who constantly flaunted her better curves, I had never really gotten over the fact that I hadn’t grown in the slightest since middle school. My nineteen year old self was often mistaken for a high school girl, and that was after going through the trouble of giving myself a boost in a few places. For example, wearing a push-up bra with extra padding.

The reason this was tolerable, however, was because it was Kate. It’s not like I had anything to hide from her. Just a year ago, we were still living under the same roof before I left for college. While I typically made a point to bring my outfits with me into the bathroom before a shower, there were still a few times where she saw me in nothing but a towel and wet hair. In other words, she knew how much work I put into my image in the morning. Chest included. This wouldn’t be a mortifying reveal; instead, it would just be another way for her to mess up my mature physical facade.

My short-sighted plan was to act like none of this bothered me. Kate would get bored, eventually, and I’d get my phone back and earn some peace and quiet. What I failed to focus on, however, was the fact that we’d be arriving at our cousins’ place soon enough. Hair and make-up was one thing, but this was going to make their first impression of me even worse. It had been nearly ten years since we last visited, and I was looking less and less like the college girl I saw in the mirror this morning.

Reaching back and shifting forward in my seat, I unclasped my bra.

Normally, I’d just slip one arm free and pull the undergarment out the other side in a matter of seconds. It’s what I usually did at night when I wanted to get comfortable while keeping the same tank top or t-shirt on. Except this was the middle of the day, and I was planning on putting the bra back on at some point. So, in order to keep the padding more or less in place, I went through the more arduous task of freeing each arm from its strap while making sure the tank top stayed mostly in place throughout my shifting and wriggling. And, when the bra wasn’t supported by either shoulder, I made sure to fold the cups together before reaching under the hem of my top and pulling it out altogether.

If the visual of my bra in my hands wasn’t enough, the sight of my chest made things even worse. Not only were my small mounds way less existent than they were a moment ago, but the tank top didn’t do much to stop my nipples from poking through the light material. And, since the tank top was also slightly damp, it did very little to hide my form either. Not that there was much to hide.

“You’re smaller than I remember, Annie,” Kate giggled. Then she held out her hand, palm up, getting right to it. “Okay, sis. Hand it over.”

p

Part Fifteen

I held out my bra to Kate without even thinking about it.

It was getting to the point where going along with whatever she wanted was the easiest option. I wanted my phone, and I wanted some peace and quiet; the quickest way to achieve both of those things was by taking the path of least resistance. Besides, the damage was already done. My barely existent chest already lost all the support and padding that was there a moment ago, and it wouldn’t make a difference whether the bra was in my possession or Kate’s. Either way, she would probably be the one making the rules about when I was allowed to wear it again.

As always, my goal was to avoid enabling her. So, trying to ignore her jab about my size, I allowed her to pull the bra from my hand. “Here,” I said. The goal was to seem casual and indifferent about it, even though I was pretty self conscious about my petite chest.

Rather than folding up the bra and tucking it into her purse, like she had done with my panties earlier, Kate took a minute to examine the undergarment. “Wow, this is a lot,” she said. Reaching into one of the cups, clearly not bothered that they were just pressed against my boobs, she pulled all the padding right out. “Really, sis? You know, you’re going to have to accept that you’re done growing. And this?” she said, cracking the back window, “It’s false advertising.”

It took me a second to connect the dots. “Kate, don’t!” I exclaimed. My attempt to lunge forward was quickly foiled by my seatbelt jerking me to a stop right away. That’s what they’re designed for; reacting to sharp movements. To my dismay, I had to watch helplessly as my inconsiderate sister dropped the padding through the small gap offered by the mini van’s back window. It was the type that only cracked for a little air, rather than being able to roll down all the way, but that was still enough space.

I whipped my head around to look out the back window, still clinging to the hope that maybe Kate used some kind of sleight of hand to freak me out. No such luck. I watched as the nice silk hit the highway, wincing as the car behind us ran it over. It’s not that the insert was particularly expensive. I went with more breathable pads that were cleverly sewn fabric, because they felt more like I was still wearing a bra instead of having silicone press into me all day. Mine were cheaper, too, and this was a short enough weekend that I hadn’t packed any spares.

While I was busy dealing with the visual of my padding being destroyed on the highway behind us, as well as the realization that I was going to be painfully flat all weekend because of it, Kate took the opportunity to remove the second insert and drop it out the window just as effortlessly as the first. “There. No more fake boobs,” she said, dusting off her hands for emphasis.

They’re not- They’re not fake! They just boost me half a cup size. The push-up bra covers the other half. I prefect ‘enhance,’ but there’s no way I’d be able to explain it to Kate without her turning my words against me. Especially not when I was dumbstruck by what she just did. “Those were mine, sis! You can’t just-”

“I can ‘just,’” she said. Now that her work was done with my bra, she haphazardly dropped it down by her feet, between her right leg and the side of the car. Short of unbuckling and going through an arduous maneuver over or under my sister’s legs, I wasn’t going to get the undergarment back without her allowing it. “Now drink your water, Annie. I’d hate for you to get dehydrated.”

Unbelievable. Un-fucking-believable.

But what could I do? Kate was an insensitive brat, and she hadn’t listened to any of my lectures in years. The inserts were already gone, the damage already done. I was too old to whine to our parents, and it’s not like they would believe me anyway. Kate would bat her eyes and act all innocent and clueless about the whole thing, and I’d only succeed in verbally admitting that I stuff my bras. Pretty sure our mother would side with Kate on the ‘false advertising’ front, too.

So, biting my tongue, I reached under the seat and grabbed another fresh bottle of water. My phone was more important than arguing with my sister. She was way too quick on her feet, she had a tendency to weaponize anything I said, and I was at too much of a disadvantage thanks to the bulky underwear I let her talk me into putting on. Add pigtails, freckles, and a flat chest to the mix, and there was no way she was going to take anything I said seriously.

This time around, I watched her a lot more carefully. I wasn’t about to get halfway through a second bottle, only to have her pull the same trick and then push me to drink a third and fourth because this one also ‘didn’t count.’ The good news was, she didn’t start timing me again. The bad news was, I was still really bad at chugging. While I wanted to take my sweet time just to spite her, I also knew that every minute spent drinking was another minute she could come up with something else to annoy me.

Setting the first aside, already feeling bloated from the late lunch we had in the car, as well as the one and a half bottles I just downed, I reluctantly retrieved another from the cooler. At this point, I was in too deep. This task was the very thing that led to me losing my bra, and it would be unacceptable if I ended up with nothing to show for my troubles. No pun intended.

So, after taking a short breather, I kept drinking.

Part Sixteen

It took at least ten minutes to finish the second full bottle, probably. Kate still had my phone, and I hadn’t thought to glance at the clock at the front of the car before starting the exhausting task. The first chugging attempt had been one thing; there was time pressure, and it was just the one bottle involved. Technically on number three, it was a small miracle that I was actually able to force the rest of the water down.

I’m the kind of girl who only eats a quarter of her meal, and takes the rest to go. For someone used to small portions, drinking around two liters of water in under half an hour was a lot. But I did it. Because there was too much on the line to quit halfway. “Phone.” I held out my hand in a conscious attempt to mirror the way Kate did for my bra. I can be demanding, too. And she gave me her word.

As bratty as my younger sister can be, at least she keeps her promises. The trade-off being, of course, that she found a way to weaponize a promise, as I experienced back at the rest stop.

Still, I was a little surprised when she procured my phone from her purse. I had expected her to drag things out, or reveal how she actually hadn’t agreed to XYZ. Because even when I’m watching for it, Kate still has a way of subtly ‘agreeing’ to things without fully saying the words herself. Not this time, apparently. She placed the phone into my hand and let go without so much as a teasing tug-of-war game.

“And the photo?” I asked. Being agreeable about one thing wasn’t about to distract me from the other half of the deal that we made.

“You’re like, the most impatient little girl ever,” Kate said. Mimicking my patented eye roll, and adding a personal flair of her own in the form of a small sigh, she pulled out her own phone. She turned the screen towards me before unlocking it, so I could watch the whole process. I felt myself flush a bit when faced with the photo. My top was freshly wet in the picture, and I was looking at Kate and the camera with parted lips. Instead of the shock and annoyance I remember feeling, I ended up looking immature and pouty thanks to the pigtails.

Seeing the childish styling of my previously perfect red hair, not to mention the freckles, it felt somewhat pointless to push back against her words. But I had to. “I’m not a little girl,” I said. I’m in college, for fuck’s sake. And, also worth mentioning, “Kate, I’m your older sister.”

“It doesn’t matter how old you are,” she said. Deleting the photo with a simple tap of her finger, Kate glanced up to meet my eyes. “You’re a girl, Annie. And you’re little. So, what does that make you?”

That is SO not how that works. “Kate, I’m a woman,” I said. Setting my phone aside for a moment in order to give my full attention to my sister, I continued. “And so are you. You’re eighteen now, sis. It’s time to grow up.”

With an idle smile, Kate used her free hand to give one of her boobs a squeeze. “I am grown up, Annie. You’re the one playing pretend, with your pads and make-up and heels. Just admit it. You’re the little sister here.”

“Kate-”

“Annie, come on. You’re literally wearing pull-ups.”

It had the same two effects as always. One, I blushed at the reminder of the bulk between my legs that I had managed to put out of my mind for a few minutes. Two, my head snapped towards the front of the car to make sure no one overheard Kate’s way too casual mention of what she was supposed to be staying quiet about.

There was no ground to stand on when Kate kept pulling the rug out from under me. As long as I was wearing wet, yellowed pull-ups, I was at a huge disadvantage. With a visual like that, no one would dare get close enough to do a sniff test to verify that it was simply a colored sports drink. It was crucial to keep my sister’s silence until I was able to wash up and put on normal underwear.

But, at the same time, I couldn’t just let her walk all over me. “Kate, keep your voice down.” Speaking in a hushed tone myself, I narrowed my eyes and tried to act like none of this was bothering me. “You promised you wouldn’t tell.”

“Did I?” Kate asked, “I don’t think I did. But if you want to swear me to secrecy now, I’m all ears!”

I actually couldn’t remember. It felt like she said she’d keep this to herself, but maybe that was just to ensure I got in the car without changing. The shock of having her drink poured down my pull-ups was enough of a shock that everything afterwards was a bit of a blur. “What do you want, Kate?” I asked. In comparison to my sister, I wasn’t particularly creative. Short of offering my phone back up to her, I couldn’t think of anything that would make for an appealing deal. Plus anything I suggested would show her what bothered me the least, and then she’d have more information to go the opposite direction.

“Hmm . . .” she mused. After knowing my sister for years, I still didn’t know how to deal with her in the slightest. We were total opposites, and she treated literally everything like it was a game. No matter how hard I tried, she wasn’t going to take any of this seriously. It was going to be nice to have the buffer of relatives in a few hours so I wouldn’t have to deal with her usual nonsense.

For now, however, I was her only source of entertainment.

“Got it!” Kate exclaimed. She reached into her purse with a smirk, “Oh, Annie. This is going to be so CUTE.”

Part Seventeen

I didn’t have to stay in suspense for very long.

Without much bravado, Kate retrieved what she had been searching for in her purse. I wasn’t sure what I was expecting, but it definitely wasn’t this. With an idle smirk still on her face, my sister held up a pacifier.

It was pink, just like the pull-ups. I was surprised, of course, but also confused. Why the fuck would she have something like that with her? She answered that one pretty quickly, either reading my mind or getting lucky. “I bought it at the rest stop when you weren’t looking. Surprise! Aren’t I the sweetest sister? I mean, when’s the last time you got me a gift?”

“Kate, you can’t be serious,” I said. This time around, there wasn’t a lot of mystery in terms of her immature scheming. There was only one thing she’d want me to do with a pacifier.

“Come on, Annie. It will be fun!” Like usual, that ‘fun’ was going to be pretty one-sided. “Look, it’s easy, and totally fair. As long as you keep it in, I won’t say a single word. Not to our parents, not to you. Unless you ask, of course. I know you like having my attention.”

Admittedly, it was tempting. Not only would she stay silent about what I was worried about most, but I’d also finally get a reprieve for the rest of the drive. Some peace and quiet would be nice, especially after so much back to back nonsense. But, still. At what cost? A picture of me sucking on a pacifier would be even more embarrassing than the previous one.

Was that my only hang-up? Earlier, I would have flat out refused to do something like this, simply to avoid giving Kate the satisfaction. But now that she had put me through so many demeaning situations and visuals, one more wouldn’t be the end of the world. She would be amused, and I’d suffer through a little teasing. So, the usual. “No pictures. Or videos,” I demanded, adding the potential loophole right away. “Promise me.”

“So paranoid, sis,” Kate giggled. She crossed her heart with her index finger, and followed it up by giving her left boob a small squeeze. The movement drew my eye, which was no doubt her intention. A glance towards her chest that was more impressive than mine in every way. Plus the awkwardness of inadvertently checking out my own sister’s cleavage. “If you put your pacifier in, I promise I won’t take any pictures or videos unless you give me permission to do so.”

“And you won’t pressure me to give you permission?” I asked, with an eye roll.

“God, Annie. Stop acting like a little brat.” Without any warning, she leaned forward and shoved the pacifier into my mouth. My lips parted more in shock than anything else, which was enough for the silicone teat to push all the way in until the lip shield stopped any further progress. “No. Keep it in.” When I squirmed a bit from the unexpected intrusion, Kate just pushed a little more firmly with the babyish accessory.

The sudden sternness caught me off guard, and I found myself frozen for a moment. The pacifier awkwardly sat in my mouth, as I wasn’t about to start sucking on it. Feeling uncomfortable as Kate’s eyes remained locked on my own, I shifted in my seat, only to feel a sharp pinch on my thigh. “Mmm!” I yelped into the pacifier. Starting to say Kate’s name, my voice muffled from the plastic and silicone in the way, I barely got that far before she was speaking again.

“No.” It was one of those quiet growls that carried more weight than someone yelling. “Are you a mature college girl, Annie? Nod.”

Feeling a little helpless against Kate’s attitude and her intense proximity, I did as she said. Reluctantly nodding my head to her question, because it was true.

“Then prove it,” Kate said, “I’m going to let go now, and you’re going to suck on your pacifier like a good little girl. Do you understand?”

My head was spinning, and all I could manage to do was nod again.

With narrowed eyes, Kate gave a pointed push on the pacifier, then let go completely. Against my better judgment, I did as I was told. Without her fingers holding it in place, I had to tighten my lips around the thing. Tongue and teeth brushed against the soft teat, and the plastic guard gently pressed against my lips like it was designed to do. For a moment, I just awkwardly sat there with the pacifier in my mouth, until Kate reminded me that I was supposed to suck on it.

Somehow, this was supposed to prove that I was a mature girl. A college girl. The rational part of my brain knew that doing what my sister was asking of me would result in a visual that was the complete opposite, but I didn’t know what else to do. After all the jabs about my size and my attitude, I found myself wanting to show that I wasn’t difficult, or immature, or a whiny girl. So, staying quiet and averting my gaze, I began sucking on the pacifier.

“Good girl, Annie.” Kate sat back in her seat. Trusting me to keep at it, apparently. A second later, I learned why. “Now here are the rules, sis. I’ll stay quiet for the rest of the ride, but only if you stay quiet. You’re going to keep your pacifier in, and you’re not going to say another word until the end of the drive. Nod for me?”

I wasn’t totally on board with this, so my nod was only a small dip of my chin. As in, ‘I heard you.’ Not so much that I agreed.

“Good girl,” she repeated, “Because if you take your pacifier out, or you speak without permission, I’m going to come clean about your little accident.”

Part Eighteen

Under normal circumstances, I would have argued.

Except that isn’t possible when you don’t have a voice. While it would have been possible to mumble a complaint through a pacifier, or simply take it out to have a real conversation, Kate had essentially rendered both of those options useless. After everything I had subjected myself to, after all of her games that I had reluctantly played along with, I wasn’t about to trip at the finish line. If the only way to keep her lips sealed was to do the same with mine, so be it.

Thankfully, I had my phone back. Sitting in silence with nothing to do would have been a lot worse. True to her word, Kate also kept her mouth shut. As usual, honoring the deals she made. However, she pretty quickly found a loophole. More than once, she tapped my shoulder and showed me her phone. Written in bold in her Notes app, she reminded me that I had to actually suck on the pacifier.

It was obvious why she wasn’t texting me. No evidence. This way, she could be as pushy as she wanted while still putting on her innocent act to our parents. Begrudgingly going along with it, mostly so she would just leave me alone, I made an effort to actually suck on the bland silicone. Exaggerated at first, to get Kate off my case, but eventually I just settled into idle lip movements as I sat there killing time on my phone. It was surprisingly more natural than letting it just awkwardly sit in my mouth, though it would have been even more natural to not have it there at all.

Unfortunately, being in the back seat didn’t make us invisible. Eventually, our mother noticed, and asked about it. But Kate was ready. “Annie said one of her friends dared her to bring it. She apparently has to keep it in for the whole drive. And the drive home, too! Honestly, I think it’s a little immature, but you know how Annie can be.”

My eyes slightly widened at that addition. Seriously? But I was in no position to push back on it. Instead, I just awkwardly nodded to Kate’s lies. About the dare, of course. Not the fact that I was immature, even if it definitely looked like it at the moment.

Our mother just mumbled something to herself and turned to face forward again. The second she wasn’t looking at us any more, I glared daggers towards Kate. She just smiled and gave me a wink.

Then we were back to silence. Both texting on our phones, though I was in a way more uncomfortable position in comparison. Doubled pull-ups, sucking on a pacifier, and constantly reminded about the braided pigtails every time I shifted in my seat and felt them sway. No bra, either, and my small mounds were constantly perked up by the damp tank top still clinging to my chest. Little by little, I allowed Kate to make me look like a total mess. Thankfully, she refrained from taking pictures like she said she would.

The bigger issue, however, was how much of this I could fix before we arrived? It had been so long since we had seen our cousins, and this would be quite the embarrassing first impression. My padding was lost to the interstate, so putting my bra back on would only succeed in giving me a small boost thanks to the push-up design. Unless I could find a way to grab my make-up bag and get through my whole routine with a small hand mirror while standing outside their house, I was stuck with my stupid freckles on display. Maybe I could undo the pigtails and put my hair up in a messy pony?

Ugh! I looked so put together in the morning, and my current appearance was a far cry from the mature college girl looking back at me in the mirror a few hours ago.

With all the mental turmoil and stress about how I was going to come across to our relatives, yet another problem managed to sneak up on me. I really had to use the bathroom. Drinking three full water bottles in a short amount of time is bound to have that effect, especially when it compounds on what might have already been an issue anyway. After a thermos of iced coffee this morning, and a glass or two of water for lunch, I had been too distracted by Kate’s dare at the rest stop to think about using the restroom for its intended purpose before putting on the pull-ups. And, let’s be honest. I’m a small girl, which doesn’t lend itself well to so many fluids back to back.

Normally, I’d just pipe up and ask for another stop. Kate had already done a splendid job of making me look immature to our parents. At this point, what harm was there in looking like the weak link on a road trip? Except, of course, I had the damn pacifier to deal with. No talking, according to my sister, or I’d be in trouble.

There was one piece of good news amidst these overlapping deals that were making everything a mess–I had my phone back. If Kate could use loopholes and promises to her advantage, then so could I. ‘No speaking’ didn’t mean not communicating at all. So I typed out a quick text to my sister, hoping she would give me a break.

‘Ask for another rest stop.’ Direct and to the point. Not a question, either. There was also the afterthought that this could work out in my favor. If Kate asked, then it would be their perfect angel making the request instead of the sister who always seemed to take the fall.

Kate was already on her phone, so I knew that she would see it right away. When she did, however, she just flicked the notification away and rolled her eyes. I had to fight the temptation to blow up her phone with notifications, as letting my emotions get the better of me would just give her more ammo to use against me. She didn’t end up ignoring me completely. It just took a minute or two for her to get around to opening my text. In response, I was simply given a ‘Why?’

‘Because,’ I began typing, then stopped. Because I need to use the bathroom? It was the truth, but speaking of ammo . . .

With a demeaning prank/dare like this, I could only imagine what kind of idea that would spark in her devious, insensitive mind. Considering that she was the one who came up with the water chugging idea, I wouldn’t put it past her to capitalize on the result. But I needed to think of something, before she got distracted again. ‘Because I want to change shirts,’ I typed back. The damp tank top honestly wasn’t the end of the world, but it would be nice to put on something dry. And, if Kate didn’t attach herself to my hip during the process, maybe I could run in and get rid of the pull-ups.

This time, she replied right away. ‘You’re fine, Annie. We’ll be there in an hour or so.’

The dismissive attitude of the text made my lips purse around the pacifier in annoyance. This was SO frustrating! And I couldn’t just blow her off and disobey the earlier directive. I had already come this far, and I was determined to keep all of this under wraps. Just a little longer, and our parents would be out of the picture and I’d have a private bathroom at our relatives’ place to get myself sorted.

In the meantime, however, I shifted in discomfort. Not just from the bulky underwear, but also to bring my legs together. It was actually impossible to fully do so, thanks to the second layer Kate insisted on earlier.

Trying to push the thoughts of needing the restroom away turned out to be as difficult as trying to not think of a purple elephant. Now that the faint urge had hit me, and now that I had texted Kate about it, clearing my mind in favor of something else never fully stuck. Time also seemed to drag on, but I eventually found a temporary cure by distracting myself with card games on my phone. Sucking on the pacifier while idly stressing about how I literally let my younger sister take away my voice, I began counting down the minutes.

Exactly fourteen minutes passed, and then Kate reached over and got my attention with a sharp pull on one of my pigtails.

“Mmm!” I whined into the babyish accessory, shooting her a glare that I imagine didn’t look particularly intimidating in my current get-up.

“Hey, Annie,” she said, holding out her pinky, “If you chug two more bottles, I’ll talk to our parents for you.”

Part Nineteen

This time, I didn’t push back in the slightest.

The moment Kate offered me the deal, I took her pinky and silently agreed to it. While I hated chugging, and knew full well what another two bottles would do to my already slightly full bladder, it wasn’t worth the fight. If I could just get through the totally unfair task, then we could pull over and I could relieve myself. Otherwise, I’d have to risk waiting an hour or so while sitting in discomfort the entire time.

After I took her pinky, Kate grinned. “Okay! You know where the cooler is.”

Under my seat. Not wanting to give her the satisfaction of hesitating or grimacing in the slightest, I bent forward to retrieve the stash of drinks. My pigtails both swished from the movement, a reminder of yet another embarrassing feature I had let Kate get away with. Retrieving both bottles at once, I glanced towards my sister with both curiosity and a faint blush. Drinking water would contradict the ‘pacifier for the rest of the drive’ rule, yet that wasn’t my fault. She was the one insisting on all these dares, and I was the one playing along.

“Here’s the deal, little Annie,” she said. Apparently reading my expression to some degree, Kate reached forward and took the pacifier. Rather than pulling it out immediately, however, she locked eyes with me and gave it a single tap, “I’m going to take out your pacifier, but the rules still apply. No talking, got it?”

I nodded my head, feeling demeaned not only from her words, but also from the limited form of communication available to me. Similar to the phrase ‘your pull-ups,’ I also wasn’t a fan of the way she was being possessive about the babyish accessory.

“This is your pacifier, isn’t it?” Kate asked. Even when I wasn’t trying to show anything with my face, I must have been more transparent than I thought.

Once again, I quietly nodded. Not worth the fight.

With a follow-up reminder that I wasn’t allowed to speak, Kate pulled the pacifier from my lips. Passing me one of the water bottles resting on the seat beside me with her other hand, she waited until my first sip before adding yet another condition: If the whole bottle wasn’t empty in 90 seconds, I would have to start over with a new one.

My eyes widened as she picked up her phone and casually set a timer. She commented that I should be grateful for the extra seconds she had given me at the beginning, but I barely registered the ‘kindness’ she was showing me. My efforts were already fully focused on downing the water. It really was the perfect amount of time to give me in order to induce the most stress. A minute or less would have caused me to bail immediately, as there’s no way I could pull that off. More time, and maybe I would have been more relaxed. But a minute and a half was in the realm of possibility, while still being quite the challenge.

Taking sip after sip, knocking the bottle back as quickly as I was able, I shot a worried glance towards Kate when I felt a small wave of pressure in my bladder. This was the exact opposite of what you were supposed to do when you needed the restroom, and my body was probably trying to tell me that. In response, Kate just turned her phone my way and showed me that I had 45 seconds left. I still had just over half the bottle left, and I slightly panicked when I realized that there was a good chance the same thing from earlier was going to happen. Chugging a whole bottle for nothing.

Renewing my efforts, I began drinking as quickly as possible. Ever the helpful sister, Kate kept the screen aimed towards me the entire time so I could see the seconds ticking away. Twelve, eleven, ten . . . I pushed myself to complete the task that was only getting more difficult as the cold water, fresh from the cooler, irritated my teeth and burned my throat. Closing my eyes for a moment, I sucked in the rest of the water before the clock hit zero.

Technically, I made it, because the bottle was empty. For a few seconds, however, I must have looked like a chipmunk. Cheeks full from how I had desperately drained the last of the bottle, threatening to spill out with one wrong move of my lips. Little by little, I swallowed the rest, ignoring Kate’s giggles.

While I was busy with that, she made herself useful by undoing the cap of the second bottle. And, the moment I let out a winded exhale from the first round, Kate put the new one to my lips. “Drink up, sis!” she said. Then she tilted the bottle upwards.

The only way to keep the water from cascading down my chin and all over my outfit was to do what she wanted. Instinctively parting my lips, I began drinking. Raising my hands to take the bottle, I was surprised when Kate didn’t pass it off to me this time. Instead, she kept the bottle elevated and poised so any wrong move from me would cause the whole thing to topple and soak me in the process.

Rather than being pushed to my limits from a time standpoint, I found myself racing against the speed at which the water was being poured into my mouth. Out of nowhere, I felt a stronger wave of pressure down below. My bladder was sending me pretty obvious signals, yet I was currently stuck doing the opposite of what would help.

Shifting in my seat, trying to press my legs together as Kate force fed me the water, my movements ended up causing an adverse effect. By disrupting my body’s position, a small squirt of urine released itself that was completely out of my control. The surprise, as well as the patch of warmth between my legs, caused another short stream to escape before I could wrestle control back.

That did NOT just happen! I just peed into pull-ups; the thing that I had only considered a joke or a teasing idea when Kate introduced the first round of waters a while ago. It’s not like I fully wet myself, but that no longer seemed outside the realm of possibilities. Just over halfway done with the second water bottle, I sat as rigidly as possible after learning my lesson from the first time. It was now an active effort to control my body’s urges; the pressure only built as I drank more, and the warmth between my legs certainly didn’t help.

As I finished the last drop of the water, my immediate instinct was to blurt out what I needed. Screw Kate’s games, and her stupid rules. I needed the bathroom, and I needed it now. However, she beat me to the punch. Before I could catch my breath from the nonstop chugging, she shoved the pacifier back into my mouth. “No talking, Annie.” She pushed the plastic lip guards forward, keeping the silicone teat firmly in my mouth. “I’m serious. Be a good little girl, or else.”

Letting go with another tiny push, she turned her attention to the front of the car. “Hey, guys? Little Annie wants to know if we can stop again. How close are we?”

At least she was sticking to her word. I just sat there silently, sucking on the pacifier. This was all so mortifying. At nineteen years old, I was in pull-ups and dangerously close to using them. I had no idea how to handle being spoken to like that by my younger sister. In my desperation, obedience felt like the best option. Anything to save myself from such an ultimate embarrassment.

“Just under forty minutes,” our mother said, “We’re almost there. What does Annelise need?”

“Another bathroom break,” Kate replied, with another amused giggle, “You know how she can be on road trips. Tiny girl, tiny bladder!”

“Kate, be appropriate.”

“Sorry, Mom. Anyway, what do you think?”

“Can she hold it? We’re still running a few minutes late.”

The two of them were having a conversation about me like I wasn’t even there. As the older girl, I was offended, until I remembered that I had already been seen sucking on the pink pacifier. With Kate talking for me, I was resigned to communicate the only way I could. Shaking my head ‘no’ with pleading eyes, I looked towards Kate for mercy. Honestly was my only option at this point, as pretending otherwise would cause us to keep driving. It already hurt to fight against the building pressure, and I was beyond skeptical about whether or not I could keep it up for forty minutes.

Kate shot me a wink. “Annie will be fine! She’s a big girl.”

Part Twenty

Stuck with a pacifier in my mouth and a determination to not blow my cover after I had done so much to keep this between me and my sister, I could only whimper in displeasure as Kate told our parents that we didn’t need to pull over after all.

The conversation more or less ended there, and I could only glare at Kate for her betrayal as she settled back into her seat. “What?” she asked, “I said I would talk to them. I talked to them. Now hush, little sis.”

Every fucking time! Twisting words and manipulating things so technically she hadn’t done anything wrong. It’s how she got me into trouble when we were kids, and it’s how she kept convincing me to make this road trip worse and worse for myself. And it’s not like I could put all the blame on her. Not only should I have known better, but it’s not like she was forcing me to do any of this. It may have been in a begrudging fashion, but I did agree to go along with most of this. Kate was just too good at pushing my buttons.

I tried to distract myself with my phone, but the clock at the top of the screen was impossible to ignore. As was the pressure in my bladder, the inevitable flood that I needed to hold back until we made it to our cousins’ house. Thirty-five more minutes, plus the effort of getting to the bathroom while no longer being able to clamp my legs together.

Each minute was more painful than the last. A small pothole was enough to cause me to briefly lose control again, and another short stream of pee added to the warm, damp spot I was already sitting on. I squeaked into the pacifier and looked at Kate with wide eyes, but she seemed completely disinterested in my plight. She was focused on her own phone, texting away without a care in the world while I was fighting to keep the most humiliating thing possible from happening to myself. It hurt to try, but that was better than the alternative.

Today wasn’t my lucky day, however, as the stretch of highway that we were driving on was the kind that was in need of some repair. Less than a minute later, we hit a slightly larger pothole, and that was it for me.

More warm pee was released into my pull-ups, completely out of my control. ‘No! Please, no!’ I pleaded to myself, to my body. But it was too late. I couldn’t do anything to prevent the dam from bursting. A wave of warmness spread all over my crotch, and then the U-shaped padding underneath took effect. The section underneath my ass began soaking things up, immediately followed by the front of the pull-up. Unlike the cold Gatorade, which had been dumped in from the back, this was warmth that was spreading outward. From me. Because I was wetting myself.

I tried to hold it back, I really did, but my efforts were fruitless. If anything, the muscles in my bladder were doing the opposite of what I wanted; pushing, to release everything. It’s like my body was punishing me for resisting its natural urges. I clutched my phone in my hands, pretending like nothing was wrong, but I could feel my cheeks radiating heat as I blushed from the faint hissing that the pull-ups only slightly muffled. As my stream continued, the warmth in the pull-ups spread, soaking the padding underneath my ass and making its way past my crotch and towards my waist.

Were the pull-ups enough to keep any of this from leaking?! At first, I had been horrified that this was happening to me. But now, I was nervous for a whole new reason. Between the full bottle dumped down my underwear earlier, and the ongoing flow, how much could two pull-ups take? I also hadn’t realized my bladder was this full. It took at least a full minute for the steady stream to finally fade into a trickle. I kept glancing down at the seat, desperately yet subtly trying to ensure that nothing had soaked through to my skirt or the leather beneath me.

It was only when I looked up again, still horrified that I had just wet myself as a college girl, that I noticed Kate grinning. “You didn’t!” she exclaimed, clasping a hand over her mouth to keep from laughing out loud. “Annie, we’re almost there,” she said, lowering her voice so the conversation was just for us, “You couldn’t hold it just a little longer?”

I felt so small, so defeated. While this was Kate’s fault in a lot of ways, I couldn’t but blame myself as well. How did I let things get so out of control?! I didn’t just wet myself, I soaked the pull-ups. Sitting in a warm, wet mess that was a lot worse than sticky Gatorade, I could only meet Kate’s eyes and offer a tiny shake of my head.

No. I couldn’t hold it. I tried to tell her, but she didn’t listen.

“You know I used to babysit, right?” she asked, “And whenever little girls have accidents, they need to be punished. And no, I can’t go easy on you just because we’re sisters. Let’s start with your phone privileges.” Just like that, she plucked the phone from my hands before I could register her words and make a move to stop her.

“Mmm!” I whined into the pacifier, “Kate-”

“Ah, ah,” she said. Before I could mumble more than that through my teeth that had to stay together to keep the accessory in, she grabbed it and pushed it back against my lips, “No talking. Nod if you just had an accident.”

Blushing all over again, I meekly nodded my head twice. The pigtails brushed my shoulders from my movements, though the childish braid of my beautiful red locks was nothing in comparison to the ballooned pull-ups between my legs.

“It’s a good thing we put your pull-ups on before the drive, isn’t it? Otherwise you would have ruined your cute outfit and these nice seats. Now, if you want my help getting cleaned up without our parents finding out, you’re going to have to do something for me.”

Once again, I was stuck. Before, there was at least the weak defense that I could use if Kate tried to get me in trouble with her innocent angel act. But now that I had soaked the pull-ups with my own pee, I couldn’t claim Gatorade. If anything, the sports drink was working against me worse than before, as it served to make this ‘accident’ look a lot worse than it actually was.

Rather than silently communicating with my head, I just met Kate’s eyes and waited. It was the one bit of defiance I could find as her older sister. I wouldn’t write her a blank check, but at this point I was embarrassed and vulnerable enough that I felt like I’d probably end up going along with whatever she said.

Or so I thought.

Cutting right to the chase, and certainly not mincing words, Kate looked me dead in the eyes and gave the pink pacifier an assertive push. Her expression was mostly serious, but there was the slightest hint of a smirk at the edge of her lips. I knew my brat of a sister well enough to know that this wouldn’t be a fun idea, but I had no idea just how far she intended to take things until she bluntly said,

“I think you should shit yourself, Annie.”

Part 21

I thought I had heard it all.

I thought I had done it all. My sister had pulled a lot of nonsense over the years, though this road trip was definitely the furthest she had ever strung me along. Somehow, I had resigned myself to quietly wetting myself instead of taking out the pacifier and yelling up to our parents that we needed to pull over. Partially my fault for being such a pushover and digging my own hole deeper? Maybe. As I sat in soaked pull-ups, however, it was a lot easier to blame her for everything instead.

But her latest suggestion was taking things too far. I had already taken off my padded bra. Subjected myself to pigtails, and freckles that came with all my make-up being removed. Sucking on a pacifier was the latest development that further demeaned me and amused my sister. Well, I guess wetting myself was technically the most recent. But that was on accident! I had tried my hardest to hold it, and I had wanted to pull over.

This, however, would be no accident. For starters, I didn’t even have to go. And if I did, it would be easy to hold it for another thirty minutes or whatever. So, to go on purpose? At my age? Fuck no. With the pacifier still in my mouth, however, all I could do was shake my head in protest. After everything, I still couldn’t bring myself to take out the babyish pink accessory. Breaking Kate’s rules now would land me in a world of trouble.

“You have to, sis. It’s not healthy to hold it in.” She reached over and pulled the pacifier from my lips. With a serious look, she continued, “Let’s talk, Annie. Why shouldn’t you? You have permission to speak.”

What kind of question was that?! It took me a second just to grapple with the fact that my younger sister was so boldly reminding me that she was in charge of my voice when it came to the drive and the pacifier. On top of that, I didn’t even know where to start. “I’m not doing that,” I hissed, lightly blushing at just the thought. There would be no coming back from such a mortifying task.

She just cocked her head and gave me a curious look. “You didn’t answer the question. And here I was, thinking that you were learning how to be a big girl. Now, Annie, let’s try this again. Why shouldn’t you use your pull-ups for their intended purpose?”

“They’re not-” I began, cutting myself off for a moment to both lower my voice and collect my thoughts. While we had already been over this once, I couldn’t help myself. “They’re not my pull-ups,” I said, less confident this time around now that I had actually used them. Which is why I moved on before Kate could call me out. “And pull-ups are for accidents. Not for anything, like, umm . . . on purpose.” Once again, the prospect of doing as she suggested brought on a new wave of heat to my cheeks and caused me to stumble over my words at the end.

“Accidents,” Kate repeated, “So you’re saying what just happened was an accident? You didn’t wet yourself on purpose?”

“Of course not!” I hissed. Neither answer was good, of course. There’s no way I’d ever do something like that intentionally, but my denial essentially implied that I had a daytime ‘accident’ as a nineteen year old. “I mean,” I said, trying to backpedal, “It wasn’t like- I told you we needed to stop, Kate!”

“Yeah, so you could change shirts,” she reminded me.

Shit. That was the lie I told her over text, wasn’t it? The conversation Kate had with our mother about my ‘tiny bladder’ made it sound like we were both on the same page, as did the fact that Kate had me drink more water in exchange for said conversation. She HAD to have known what I really wanted. Right?

“No, you said-”

“I thought teasing about you being the weak link was better than telling her that you spilled all over yourself. If you needed a potty break that badly, you should have said something.”

“I didn’t spill!”

“You didn’t spill. You didn’t have an accident. Sounds like you’re not taking responsibility for yourself, Annie. Not very mature of you.”

“But-”

“Just admit it, sis. You had an accident. You wet your pull-ups.”

“It’s not like that! I didn’t-”

“Yes, you did. Mature girls are honest, Annie. Now say it.”

My head was spinning. That wasn’t anything new when it came to trying to argue with my sister, but this particular instance made the headache of it all so much worse. My current get-up. My soaked underwear. The nervousness of our parents being in the front seat, as well as our relatives we’d soon be greeting. I’d have to get through a minute or two of faking a smile and making small talk before being able to excuse myself to deal with this mess. With all that on my mind, I just didn’t have the mental strength to fight Kate on this.

Glancing away with a much deeper blush, I mumbled, “I wet my pull-ups . . .”

“You wet your pull-ups in the middle of the day,” Kate clarified. Pausing for a second to let that sink in, much like the warmth between my legs had thoroughly sunk into the padding beneath me and ballooned the innermost pull-up, she went on. “So, here’s what we can do. Since your little bladder clearly can’t be trusted, maybe you should wear pull-ups for the rest of the summer.”

The rest of the summer?! “Kate!” I exclaimed, before quickly clasping a hand over my mouth from both the unexpected volume and to hide the subsequent jaw drop. That would be MONTHS. Summer had barely begun. Plus this was just a one-time ‘accident’ that I still wanted to wholly blame on my sister instead of myself.

“Or,” she said, taking a turn of her own to glance towards the front of the minivan before continuing to speak more quietly than the music still playing, “You can be a big girl, right now. Finish up your business in your pull-ups. Then we can get you changed up at the house, okay?”

Surely those couldn’t be the only two options! I looked at my sister with pleading eyes, not happy with either of what she just offered me. A whole summer in babyish underwear, or degrading myself in the most disgusting way possible? If I were thinking more clearly, then I’d probably realize that there were dozens of other approaches to the current situation. But I was still mortified to be sitting on the soaked sponge underneath me and between my legs, and suddenly worried about my reputation beyond this weekend at the thought of continuously wearing pull-ups.

Kate must have seen my trepidation, because her stern gaze softened into a more casual expression complete with a smile. “Just answer hypothetically, sis. You don’t have to commit one way or the other.”

Hypothetically? Neither. “But-”

“You know, like ‘Would You Rather?’ Let’s try, Annie. Would you rather wear pull-ups all summer long, or use them for their intended purpose just once?”

Before I could stop myself, I quietly blurted out, “Just once.” To me, that would be the obvious answer if I was playing the game. Why suffer for a prolonged amount of time when you can just rip off the band-aid and get it over with?

“Good answer. You’re so fucking mature, Annelise! So, you’ll do it?”

Wait, I never said that!

Also, as badly as I wanted to be called by my full name when we were bickering about it back at the rest stop, it was actually a little weird to be addressed as such after hearing ‘Annie’ nonstop ever since we got back in the car. It threw me off for a moment, as did the sudden pressure to turn what was supposed to be a non-committal answer into reality.

“Kate, no. You said-”

“Annie. Are you a mature girl?” Kate’s stern gaze returned as she flatly asked that.

“Of course I am,” I huffed.

“Then prove it. Show me that you know how to use your pull-ups properly. I want to believe that you’re mature, Annie; I really do. But honestly, you haven’t been acting like it today. So, this is your last chance.”

But, that didn’t make sense! I wasn’t- I was the older sister, and she was the immature brat. “Kate-”

“Hush.” Quickly scooting over and putting a finger to my lips, she met my eyes with that unique intensity that I wasn’t used to dealing with. “Yes or no, Annie? Will you prove that you’re a mature girl?”

Feeling trapped in the confusing web of ‘logic,’ and particularly small from the way Kate was treating me, I quietly gave in without fully processing what I was agreeing to.

Meeting her eyes, feigning bravery and calmness against her intimidating stare, I nodded my head.

Part 22

I was actually going to do it.

After insisting that I was mature, it was starting to feel like the only option. Kate had gone on to say that a mature girl would want out of her dirty diapers as quickly as possible. The fact that I hadn’t asked for a change right after wetting my pull-ups–NOT diapers–seemed to imply the opposite, even though I tried to explain that I hadn’t been allowed to talk at the time. Stupid pacifier rule.

‘You could have texted,’ Kate had said, right away. But that wasn’t fair, either! She had confiscated my phone right afterwards, though the humiliation of wetting myself had made the following events a little blurry. Did I have time to text? If so, why didn’t I? Doubt began creeping in, which wasn’t helpful when I was already overwhelmed by so many other things. Now that I had failed to express my desire to be changed, apparently this was my last chance to show my sister that I wasn’t some immature little girl.

Gone was the college Annelise, the young woman who was so easily annoyed by Kate’s antics. I felt more like my teenage self the longer this dragged on, the version of me that was a lot more self conscious and easily swayed by authority figures. My current hairstyle certainly didn’t help, nor did the fact that my chest was almost nonexistent now that I had lost my push-up bra and the padding that went with it. But most importantly, I was wearing pull-ups and I had thoroughly soaked them without really speaking up to save myself.

The sooner I was back in clean underwear, the better. Not just to avoid the potential embarrassment of others finding out, but also for my own confidence as well.

And, to make that happen, I needed to use my pull-ups for what they were designed for. According to Kate, it made more sense. Once I fully relieved myself, she would make sure that I was properly cleaned up, and it would be clear that I was a mature girl. No one would have to find out about my little accident. So, desperately wanting all of those things–to get out of the dirty underwear, to be seen as mature despite my unfair size and youthful features, and to keep all of this a secret–I decided to go along with what she was suggesting.

It was one thing to agree. The execution, however, was something else entirely. The only reason I had wet myself was because the pressure on my bladder had eventually been too much for my body to take. But to go against a lifetime of potty training, to actively push from my rear when not in a bathroom? It wasn’t natural in the slightest, and I quickly began questioning whether or not I’d actually be able to handle the mortifying task.

I kept myself awkwardly suspended and partially squatted over the leather seat beneath me, unsuccessfully trying to go. The position wasn’t nearly as comfortable as sitting on a toilet, especially when the pull-ups sagged now that there was the space and gravity for them to do so. Plus my sister was watching, which didn’t help in the slightest. “Kate,” I quietly said, beyond nervous that one of our parents was going to glance back and see how I was keeping myself slightly elevated above the back seat. My anus opened slightly from the attempted pushes, but nothing was actually happening. “I don’t think I have to go.”

“Hmm, I think you just need some motivation, little sis,” Kate said. She tapped her lips in mock concentration while glancing up in thought, “Ooh, I know! You have 60 seconds, or I will come clean about your accident. Oh, and lift up your skirt, so I can see.”

“No, don’t!” I hissed. After everything I had done to keep this between the two of us, I absolutely couldn’t let that happen. Plus Kate had promised!! In my desperation, however, I couldn’t dwell on it. If I had learned anything from unimpressively chugging all that water earlier, it’s that my sister had a habit of making things worse whenever my time ran out. The seconds were already ticking down, and I had to make a choice.

Still hovering over the seat, head spinning, I reluctantly gripped my skirt and raised it until the pull-ups came into view, all while making a more conscious effort to push my bowels. Then I felt it. After a hard push, I could actually feel the mess coming. Realizing what I was about to do, I started resisting in a panic, but it was too late. A warm, squishy lump escaped my lower cheeks, causing the thick pull-ups to pull even more tightly around me. I must have been blushing crimson as I realized what I just did, but it wasn’t over yet. My body was acting on its own at this point, and a much larger chunk pushed itself out now that the first one had cleared the way.

Oh my God,” I whispered. What had I done?! The pull-ups sagged even lower as the mess settled between my cheeks and the padding, and I also caught a faint whiff of what I had just filled my underwear with. Even though I had just recently wet myself, I still felt a small stream of pee escape as well. It was the natural wet that tended to follow such a bowel movement, and it just added to the already soaked material underneath me.

“Annie.” Kate was staring at me in disbelief as I remained slightly raised off the seat in my squatted position. “Did you just . . . did you actually- did you actually do it?!” she whispered.

Was the sagging lump and my dark blush not enough evidence. “Now convince them to pull over,” I muttered. I couldn’t bring myself to directly answer Kate’s blunt question, and I didn’t know what else to say. Using my pull-ups for their ‘intended purpose’ made me feel the opposite of mature, but I at least remembered the other part of our agreement.

“Annie, I was kidding!” Kate exclaimed. She clamped both hands over her mouth to hold back a burst of laughter. “I thought- I thought you were just fooling around.” Kate let out a small giggle as she glanced down at the sagging material that was easily visible from the way I was still holding my skirt up. “No way . . . this isn’t happening. This isn’t happening right now!” Her eyes lit up as she poorly attempted to hold back another round of giggling.

“Kate, you said I had to!” My eyes widened at her words. No, that couldn’t be right. Kate was good at being mock serious, but the insistence on using the pull-ups for what they were designed for felt so convincing. Feeling beyond self-conscious about not only Kate’s stare, and the way I somehow let her talk me into something so insane, I quickly lowered my skirt to cover myself up.

I sat back down, and instantly wished that I hadn’t.

The sagging mess was awful enough while I was squatted, but sitting made it so much worse. The warm lump pushed back up into me and spread all over my ass, and the earlier warmth of my pee paled in comparison to how the pull-ups felt when they were full in an entirely different way. It was absolutely disgusting, and I was once again scared about whether or not two layers would be able to hold everything.

Kate finally lowered her hands from her mouth, though it still looked like she was about to break into laughter at any moment. Grinning, she said, “New low, sis. Though good thing you were wearing your pull-ups. Can you imagine the mess you would have made?”

“It’s not funny!!” I snapped. “And they’re not mine.” Kate’s words were reminiscent of what she said when I wet myself, but they were a lot more effective this time around. She was right, in a way, but it’s not like this would have happened if I was wearing normal underwear! I tried to sit still, knowing that any movement might make the horrible mess even worse. Most importantly, I needed to focus. “Kate, you said you’d convince our parents to pull over.” Kidding or not, that was the deal. And I was more desperate than ever to get out of the pull-ups that I deeply regretted putting on in the first place.

“We’ve been over this a million times, Annie. When you wear something, then it’s yours. You know, like how sexy my underwear is.” She pulled the waistband of her dark green thong out from under her jeans. The glimpse easily succeeded in making me uncomfortable, as I wasn’t interested in the slightest when it came to my sister’s underwear choices. “Or how perfect your pull-ups are for you, little sis.”

Trying my hardest to ignore everything she just said and did, I instead focused on the task at hand. “Kate. We need to pull over,” I insisted, “Now.”

With a small smirk, Kate merely uttered one little word in response.

“No.”

Part 23

No?! I needed to change! Desperately.

Aside from the disgusting feeling as I attempted to sit very, very still to not make even more of a mess, there was the sheer knowledge of how unhygienic something like this was. And, how the smell would eventually escape the thick pull-ups and be more noticeable in the confined space of the car. I had babysat before, and I knew just how quickly you knew when a baby had an accident. I would never admit it, but I was suddenly very grateful for Kate’s insistence on a second pull-up earlier. That would buy me a little time. But only a little.

Before I could find the words, my bratty younger sister had more to say. “You’ve been a bad little girl, Annie. Now just sit there and be quiet. One more word out of you, and I’m going to tell our parents what you’ve done.”

The same threat as before, but worse. Way worse. Instead of a little prank that I had a slim chance of talking my way out of, this was actually something that I DID do. To myself. On purpose. I didn’t know what was worse; wetting myself because I actually lost control, or willingly giving up control in a more mortifying and damning way. We both knew that no excuse in the world would explain an ‘accident’ of this magnitude.

After putting the pacifier back in my mouth, which I regrettably accepted with no resistance whatsoever, she went on to explain in a way that smoothed out her harsh reaction with a bit of logic. Now that we were just under thirty minutes away from our destination, there would have to be a really good reason for our parents to pull over before then. And, according to Kate, this didn’t count as an emergency. I had already filled my pull-ups, so it’s not like a few more minutes was going to change the mess that I was in. Besides, it would be easier to change in a spacious, sanitary, and private bathroom, rather than rolling the dice at a rest stop or gas station.

As usual, I found myself falling victim to my sister’s logic, as well as my own irrational self preservation. Maybe Kate was right. If we stopped now, the annoyance of our parents would put a lot of time pressure on things. Could I really get myself cleaned up from a mess like this in a matter of minutes? It was one thing to change someone else, but I could only imagine how awkward it would be handling the task alone in a cramped and dirty gas station bathroom. Sighing to myself, I resigned to her point and went back to sitting still and nervously sucking on the pacifier as we took the next exit and made our way towards our cousins’ house.

I barely remembered the neighborhood. It had been a good twelve years since we had last been here, which was why we had been dragged on this trip in the first place. Our parents’ had a business conference nearby, and the proximity to our relatives was too convenient an opportunity to pass up. We could get to know our cousins for the first time in our adult lives, as well as have the chance to explore a new city. Partially a family reunion, partially a vacation.

As we made another turn, Kate reached over and gave the pacifier a single tap to get my attention. “You have shoes in your duffel bag, right?” she asked.

Committing to her rule about not talking, though ready to pop the thing out the moment we pulled into the driveway, I simply nodded my head. As hard as I tried to play it cool, I could feel a blush coming on simply from the way I had to nonverbally answer to my younger sister. Just a few more minutes, and this would all be over.

“Good,” Kate said, “You’re going to leave your current pair in the car. It’s false advertising, just like your bra.”

That wasn’t fair! I was so stupidly short compared to her, and my image was already so messed up at the moment thanks to the pigtails/freckles combination and total lack of chest now that Kate had convinced me to give up my bra. At least the tank top had dried from earlier, preventing my nipples from poking through the light cotton. But only barely. I was going to be stuck with my arms crossed just to avoid a potential shiver from an unfortunately placed vent or AC-filled room. My underwear troubles didn’t stop there, of course; for countless reasons, I was going to make a beeline for the bathroom the moment we made it inside.

Narrowing my eyes at Kate, I shook my head. The pigtails brushed my back from the movement, and it took a lot of strength just to keep meeting her eyes. I knew how ridiculous I looked, which was exactly why I wanted the extra height my casual lifts gave me. Also, speaking of my bra, we never actually had a discussion about how long that was supposed to remain off. It was still lying on the carpet below, casually resting between her ankle and the side of the car. The padding might have been long gone, but at least the nude number had the push-up design that would help me ever so slightly in the chest department.

How to bring it up? Putting a bra back on is a lot more difficult than taking it off when trying to discreetly do so under your top, even with something as open as a tank top. And if I was stuck sucking on the pacifier until the car was parked, there wouldn’t be any time to have a conversation about it and get it back without our parents overhearing things. Bra, or shoes? No, I shouldn’t have to decide. I deserved BOTH.

Frustrated about so many things, I met Kate’s eyes and tapped on the babyish accessory myself. ’Permission to take it out, and/or to speak?’

It was Kate’s turn to shake her head. “No, Annie. Take your shoes off and give them to me. Then we’ll talk.”

Unsure of just how many turns were left in the neighborhood before we arrived, I was quick to listen this time. I bent over to undo the straps, lightly gasping and subsequently cringing as I felt the mess shift underneath me. For a blissful moment, I had forgotten about the other problem. Immature on the outside, and a mortifying secret underneath. Suddenly more motivated to end Kate’s games and my own continued humiliation, I took off my shoes and haphazardly tossed them to her side of the car.

Taking a moment to slide them underneath her seat, Kate sat back up with an amused smile. “Good girl.” She reached over and gripped the pacifier, holding it in place rather than removing it. “Now, let’s talk. Physically, you’re my little sister, right?”

It was true, but I wasn’t in love with how she was saying it. Or where she might be going with it. Regardless, I reluctantly nodded my head.

“And your name is Annie?’

For the drive.’ Still voiceless, however, I could only nod while giving her a look.

“And are you the cutest little girl in the whole world?!”

Just take the fucking pacifier out!!’ Swayed by sunk cost fallacy yet again, and the limited time we had left in the car, I begrudgingly nodded my head.

At that, Kate giggled as she finally pulled the pink pacifier from my lips. “So vain, little sis. I mean, you are cute as a button, but it’s a great big world out there. I’m sure there’s somebody cuter. Now then, did you want to say something?”

Bra, or shoes? I knew that I wanted both, but there was only so much time. “Hand me my bra!” I whisper-shouted. For all the less than intelligent decisions I had made thus far, apparently my college brain was still capable of functioning. It would be easier to slip my shoes back on when the car was parked, so this order made the most sense.

“Annie, no,” Kate huffed. Crossing her arms, she looked at me with an annoyed expression. “We’ve been over this. You don’t have boobs, and a push-up bra is cheating. We can look through something more appropriate for your size later, okay?”

My jaw actually dropped. “You can’t-” I stammered, trying to find the words. “You can’t talk to me like that!” It didn’t matter that I was the smaller girl. Kate was my younger sister, and the blunt comment about my chest was both shocking and insulting. No girl should talk to another girl like that, much less my own sister. Her patronizing offer only made it worse.

“Yes I can,” Kate said, clearly unfazed, “I have boobs, and you don’t. That makes me the big sister. End of discussion.”

Part 24

There was so much I wanted to say in response, but I never got the chance.

Before I could recover from the shock of Kate’s audacity, our parents were announcing our arrival as we pulled into the driveway. After nearly a decade, I couldn’t exactly tell the house apart from all the other cookie cutter suburban ones surrounding it. I didn’t doubt this was the place, however, which meant that I was out of time.

Kate!” I hissed, “Give me my bra!” My image was messed up in so many ways thanks to my sister’s antics throughout the drive, but this was really the only one I could control at the moment. Years of enhancing my petite chest left me feeling beyond self conscious at the thought of our relatives seeing how small I really was. Maybe it would have been different if I was an only child, or visiting alone, but I was going to be standing next to Kate when the door opened. She was already so unfairly endowed, and this would just further exaggerate our size differences.

Meeting my eyes with a tiny smirk, she just said her recent word of choice. “No.”

“Kate, seriously! You-”

Once again, I was cut off, but not by my sister this time around. The car came to a full stop, as did the music, and our mother called back to us. “Let’s go, girls! Your father and I are running late as it is. Hop out and grab your things. Quickly, now.”

“You first, Annie,” Kate said. She had palmed the pacifier the moment the focus was on us from up front, and gestured to the slim aisle between the two middle seats.

It was obvious what she was doing. Since we were in a hurry, Kate wouldn’t be able to hold onto my bra and shoes on top of her other stuff without being noticed. But if I got out of the car before her, I wouldn’t have a chance to grab them, either. I tried to speak up about it, but didn’t get very far. “But-”

“NOW, Annie!” my sister exclaimed, “God, you’ve been acting like a brat all day.”

“Come on, Annelise,” our mother added on, “We don’t have time for this.”

Blushing, I did as I was told. There wasn’t time to argue, and I was still incredibly nervous about the bigger secret that I had done so much to keep hidden. This would be the definition of ‘tripping at the finish line’ if Kate were to blab about it right now. I would just have to cross my arms for a few minutes or tactically hold my duffel bag, and then I could throw on one of my other bras once I had a little privacy. That, and deal with the mortifying mess.

Mumbling a quiet apology, I unbuckled and began climbing out of the car. Just like when I first sat down after letting Kate convince me to use the pull-ups for their ‘intended purpose,’ I found myself wincing in awkwardness and regret as gravity took over as I moved. By the time I was standing on the driveway, I could feel a noticeable sag between my legs. For the second time, I found myself deeply grateful that my sister had insisted on the second layer. First, it had contained an accident that surely would have leaked on the seats in the car. Now, it was preventing the soaked and soiled pull-ups from hanging lower and potentially poking out of my skirt.

As I stood by the car and assessed the humiliating damage I had done to myself, in a way, Kate hopped out with a grin. “Have I mentioned how fucking cute you are, little sis?” With nearly a half foot on me now that I didn’t have any footwear, she towered over me as she stepped forward and placed her hands on my shoulders. Then, out of nowhere, she kissed my forehead.

“I-” I hesitated, not even knowing what to say. Not only was it thoroughly patronizing, but my sister and I had never really had a touchy-feely relationship.

“Stay right here, Annie,” she said. Stepping back as casually as she approached, Kate turned and sauntered away to get her things from the trunk. And my things, apparently. By the time I had recovered from both my underwear situation and my sister’s recent actions, she had thrown both of our duffel bags over her shoulders.

Finding my voice again at the sight, I said, “Kate, I can get my own.”

“Don’t be silly, little sis. You’re not that strong, and I don’t want you dropping and breaking anything.” After balancing the duffels on opposite shoulders, Kate also grabbed my backpack and her purse before closing up the car, “Good to go. And what do you say to your helpful older sister, Annie?”

“You’re not-” I began, but cut myself off. Just a few more minutes, and this would all be over. Clean underwear, no more ‘Annie,’ and whatever other damage control I could do without spending years in the bathroom. “Thank you, Kate,” I begrudgingly said. No rocking the boat, no tripping at the finish line. I could play nice for a little while longer, but then I was going to have a serious chat with my overbearing and insensitive sister once I was put together and had a clear head again.

Our parents didn’t even get out of the car, as walking us to the front door would result in small talk that they didn’t have time for. Instead, we said a brief ‘goodbye’ from the driveway, not that it would be for that long. They would be staying at the house with us in a day or two, but had decided to take advantage of the free hotel room offered with the conference for the first half of the long weekend. It was more convenient than commuting.

As we approached the house, Kate flicked one of my pigtails to get my attention.

“What do you want?” I muttered. Reluctantly stopping just before the first step leading up to the porch, suspecting that she had yet another awful idea in mind, I gave her an impatient look.

I was right, of course, yet still not prepared for what she said. “You can’t change out of your pull-ups, Annie. At least, not for a little while.” The words were blunt, but there was a hint of a smile to show that she wasn’t heartbroken about the idea.

There was so much that I wanted to say. How I preferred ‘Annelise,’ and how she better not use the childish nickname in front of our relatives after everything I had done to earn the opposite. How I was getting tired of her phrasing it like they were MY pull-ups. How she needed to keep her mouth shut in general. Not falling for any of my sister’s distracting tricks, however, I just got to the point. “Yes. I can,” I said. No nonsense.

“Can you?” Kate smirked. She was clearly loving every second of this, and seemed to be confident in her doubt. “We’re going to be reconnecting with family in a second. It doesn’t make sense to shower in the middle of the afternoon. And do you really think you can clean everything underneath your dirty pull-ups in a timely manner?”

“I-” I hesitated, for the hundredth time. Though Kate was saying it with a knowing smirk, and in the rudest way possible, the logic still broke through. “Yes . . .” I replied. The upward tick in my voice must have said everything. I had been so focused on taking the awful, used pull-ups OFF that I hadn’t exactly thought through the finer details. How my ass and crotch and upper thighs would be dirty, and how I would need to clean myself off quickly and quietly. And without leaving a trace behind.

That was Kate’s next point. “No, you can’t,” she giggled. Not even trying to hide her enjoyment any more at the fact that my misery was about to be prolonged. “Aunt Miranda and Uncle Rob don’t have a baby. What are you going to do without a diaper pail?” Kate asked, referencing our collecting babysitting experiences.

Shit. That’s why my smirking sister was so confident. Short of carrying the used pull-ups through the not particularly familiar house to find a bigger trash can, I was screwed. Even if I could manage to clean myself off efficiently and discreetly, there was no way that the bulky underwear would fit into some small bathroom trash can. Not without being noticed immediately by the next person who walked in. My hopes of getting out of the disgusting mess were quickly dashed as I realized all of the complications that would follow.

“The way I see it, you have two options,” Kate said, “You could somehow explain that you had a sizable accident in your pull-ups, and earn yourself some time to change right away.” She held up one finger for that idea. “Or, you can sit through some quality family time and ask your lovely sister for some help after dinner.” Her second finger lifted for the alternative option.

Part 25

I groaned. “Your help for what? You’re the reason I’m in this mess!” Literally and figuratively; the thought renewed my blush from earlier.

“And I’m the only one who can get you out of it!” Kate grinned. “Think about it, Annie.”

“It’s Annelise.” For hours, I had begrudgingly let her get away with ‘Annie.’ In the back of my mind, I knew it was temporary. An annoying price to pay in order for her to back off this weekend. A lot had changed since then, however, so I wanted to make sure she remembered before we knocked on the door. Or until someone opened it for us, as anyone could have seen the minivan pull up.

The look on Kate’s face wasn’t a good sign. “Don’t you remember, Annie? I made a promise that I’d call you a certain something as long as you were in pull-ups. And we always keep our promises!”

FUCK. My eyes widened at the memory. Ever since the rest stop, I had framed things in my mind as ‘pull-ups in the car, Annelise at the house.’ But that wasn’t quite the case. Now that I was going to be stuck in the filthy, bulky underwear for a little while longer, she was technically within her rights to call me by the childish name. Not. Fair. Wasn’t my current predicament bad enough??

“Then don’t call me anything!” I blurted out. A loophole, maybe. “Just ‘sis’ is fine.”

“Hmm,” she mused, “What’s in it for me?”

Letting out an exasperated sigh, I asked, “What do you want?”

“I’ll think about it,” she winked, “How about this? Be a good little sister, and we’ll talk.” Before I had time to ask for specifics, or push for another promise, she rang the doorbell. “Now behave, Annie.” Out of nowhere, she reached under my skirt and pushed up on the sagging pull-ups.

Squirming as the mess shifted underneath me and temporarily pressed against my skin, I quickly slapped her hand away. That might have been her intention, because suddenly the sag was a lot more noticeable after feeling it drop more dramatically than when I had gotten out of the car. There wasn’t time to deal with my sister or the reminder of the mess between my legs, however, as the front door opened a second later.

The twins were together to greet us.

Luna and Lilah. They were both eighteen like my sister, and I immediately could tell there wouldn’t be any confusion about which was which. While the girls were identical, one of them had shoulder length hair and the other kept hers long. Similar to me and Kate, in a sense, except they were the same age and had black hair instead of red. Their casual outfits were unique as well, unlike the way their parents used to dress them.

My heart sank a little bit as I took them in, as they were both almost as tall and almost as curvy as Kate. Despite being the oldest in the group, I was easily the smallest. And I didn’t have any of my enhancements to at least bridge the gap.

“Hey!” the short haired twin said, “Luna, by the way. Come on in!” Thank God they didn’t make us play a guessing game about it. The last time we were all together, they were six years old and wore matching outfits. “Annelise, can we help with any of those bags?”

But I wasn’t holding anything. Kate had been annoying and patronizing about how I couldn’t be trusted with any of my stuff, which meant . . . They thought Kate was the older sister. Of course they did, considering my current get-up. For a second, I was too dumbstruck to speak. This kind of mix-up had happened before, but not with people that already knew us. Ten years was a long time, however, so how could I blame them?

Thankfully, she didn’t pretend to be me. “Oh, I’m Kate. This is little Annie!” she said.

“Oh!” Lilah chirped. Stepping forward to take my duffel bag off my sister’s shoulder, she responded, “For some reason, I remember Annelise being the older one.”

“I-”

Before I could confirm her memory, Kate giggled and gave my pigtail another tiny flick. “She wishes! All Annie wants is to be a high school girl, but she still has a couple years to go.”

What?!

I looked at Kate with wide eyes, beyond offended at what she was implying. That I was in fucking middle school? No way. For starters, RUDE. I knew I was small, but to suggest that I was still going through puberty? I was about to berate her, until I caught the warning look. Her friendly smile had a slightly knowing look to it and, even though we weren’t that close as sisters, I could interpret it well enough. ‘Play along.’ This was her definition of me being a ‘good little girl’ like she told me to do before announcing our arrival.

Quickly shifting my gaze towards the twins, I waited for one of them to question it so we could all move on. After all, Kate and I were their ‘older cousins.’ Surely that phrase had come up before this weekend. Right? Plus we were eight and nine years old when we last visited. It wouldn’t make sense for me to suddenly be younger than Luna and Lilah.

My hopes were dashed when Luna shrugged. “Huh. I totally had you two confused with our other cousins!”

That hit me harder than Kate’s offhand lie. Way harder. Just like that, Luna believed that I was that young?! Lilah, too, based on her lack of skepticism. I knew I had a lot of youthful features, but did Kate’s little makeover really push me that far in the opposite direction? Since my phone was still in Kate’s possession, I hadn’t had a chance to check myself out in selfie mode.

Suddenly feeling incredibly self conscious, I felt the need to set things straight regardless of Kate’s subtle warning. This was so, so embarrassing! To be mistaken for someone so young? With barely any doubt? “Luna-” I began, focusing on the twin who had spoken last.

“You know,” Kate said. Cutting me off, she sidled up next to me and discreetly slipped her hand under the waistband of my skirt. Just like that, I was put in a situation where I had to either act like nothing was wrong, or make a scene and risk the babyish underwear coming into view as my sister began fiddling with the two layers. For a moment, I thought she was just threatening visibility. I had no idea that she had something much worse in mind. With a few sharp upward tugs, I could feel the previously sagging mess start to push up against me. “Annie was just saying how no one gets her age right. If you two had to guess, what would you say?”

All I could do was stand there and keep a casual expression, to the best of my ability. Where was Kate going with this?! I was feeling more awkward and uncomfortable as each second passed, and I was going to have to find a hole to crawl into and die if these girls learned what I was wearing and what I had done. Much more awkward than them simply assuming that I was in middle school; maybe that was the point.

Almost in unison, the twins guessed, “Twelve?”

“Exactly!” Kate exclaimed. Giving one more sharp upward tug, she let go and glanced my way. “See, Annie? You’re not going to get ‘ten’ and ‘eleven’ any more now that you’ve started growing. Although honestly, you really need to start wearing training bras. Back me up, girls?”

When she let go, I could instantly feel the effects. For a second, the base of the innermost pull-up clung to me. Then, gravity did its work. The mess slowly detached from my skin and dropped back down to recreate the sag that was there before. In other words, it felt like I had just used the pull-ups again. And, thanks to Kate’s trick, the bulky underwear was all I could focus on.

“ . . . in the basement! Want me to check?” Lilah said.

“Yes, that would be great,” Kate said, “What do you say, Annie?”

I blinked in confusion. What were they talking about? I was only just registering the fact that the twins assumed that I was in the youngest grade of the range Kate suggested, all while reeling from my current underwear situation. “Sorry, what?” I asked. Great. Poor listening skills and/or a weak attention span was just going to add to the immature image.

“Seriously, Annie?” Kate sighed. With an exaggerated eye roll, she summarized for me. “Lilah said you can have some of her old clothes. Want to see what a bra feels like?”

Part 26

Everything was spinning out of control.

The only reason I had been able to handle the demeaning make-over and the mortifying ‘accidents’ in the car was because it had all happened in isolation. True, my sister was witness to my ultimate shame and humiliation, but that had been it. One person. Now our two cousins were involved in Kate’s little game, and I actually found myself caught between a rock and a hard place. If I blurted out my real age and put a stop to my sister’s lies, my childish appearance was going to raise some eyebrows and make this first impression go from bad to worse. But if I kept quiet, then what would happen when the twins eventually found out the truth?

That was bound to happen sooner rather than later. Luna and Lilah might have been easily tricked, as cousins that don’t see each other very often are bound to forget a couple important details about their extended family members. But our aunt and uncle? They would know my age for sure.

“Let’s go, Annie,” Kate said, “Don’t you know that it’s rude to linger in doorways?”

A small push on my back was enough to make the decision for me as a single step forward caused the mess between my legs to shift. That’s right. One word from Kate, one tug on my skirt, and then pigtails and freckles would be the least of my worries. She promised the pull-ups would stay between us, but I wasn’t in the most trusting mood now that she was passing me off as a twelve year old. Still. Until I was out of the sagging underwear, I would play along.

Lilah announced that she was going to the basement to see if she could find the box she was thinking about, while the other two girls took me upstairs. It wasn’t until we were halfway down the second floor hallway that I realized that perhaps it would have been better to greet the twins’ parents first. While I was nervous about spoiling Kate’s fun and suffering the consequences, they would have no such problem setting things straight.

But it was too late. With Luna leading the way, and Kate staying behind me to give me a ‘helpful’ nudge or two to keep me moving, we were led into what I assumed was the guest bedroom. There were two twin beds, and a notable lack of personal flair that I’m sure our teenage cousins had in their own rooms. Apparently, I wasn’t going to get a break from my sister at night, either. For the first time in years, we were going to be sleeping in the same room.

Gesturing to the room and sharing what I had already guessed, Luna gave me a warm smile. “Want first choice of the beds?”

Fuck.

Considering my real age, it wasn’t difficult to pick up on the not so subtle patronizing attitude. From my perspective, I was awkwardly coming to terms with Kate’s fantasy and how easy and insulting it was for our cousins to assume I was so young. From Luna’s perspective, however, she must have viewed my outward demeanor as shy or nervous. Looking back, it made sense. I had been stuck in my thoughts, and Kate had done most of the talking as the ‘older sister.’

Unable to hide my annoyance and frustration, I sighed. “I really don’t care.” Belatedly, it hit me that an attitude like that was pretty typical for a tween.

Ugh, there was no winning, was there?

And, of course, Kate jumped right on it. “Manners, Annie. How about you apologize to your older cousin for being rude?”

Luna just giggled. “It’s fine. I’m used to it. When you babysit long enough, it’s all just white noise after a while.”

As in, my pissed off adult attitude was being taken as that of a moody teenager. Even worse, Luna was saying something like that right in front of my face. I was almost provoked into verbally snapping back, but managed to catch myself. If everything I said had the potential to be taken in an immature way thanks to my appearance and Kate’s fiction, then I would only be adding fuel to the fire by letting my emotions get the better of me.

Instead, I took a breath and tried to pivot to the route I should have taken from the moment we stepped foot into the house. “Sorry, Luna.” Mature, and responsible. “I’d love to see Uncle Rob and Aunt Miranda. Are they here?”

It was Kate’s turn to sigh. Maybe I was imagining things, but it sounded an awful lot like she was mocking mine. “Patience, little sis. Let’s wait for Lilah, then we can all go down together. Although, I might find a restroom real quick. That was a long drive. Annie, do you need to go?”

Feeling another blush coming on, I shook my head. So much for looking mature.

“Luna, do you mind helping Annie get unpacked in the meantime?

“Of course not! The bathroom’s right down the hall.”

“Thanks!” My sister unceremoniously dropped her stuff onto the nearest bed. Claiming it, in a way, even though Luna said I could have first pick. It’s not that I particularly cared, as both beds looked exactly the same, but it still bothered me that Kate didn’t give me the option. She was the younger sister, even though we were both too old to be quibbling over stuff like sleeping arrangements.

For the first time all day, I got some breathing room from my sister. She disappeared around the corner, but it wasn’t exactly the peace and quiet I would have preferred. My teenage cousin was still in the room with me, and she thought I was younger than her. “Mind if I sort out your clothes?” she asked. Luna dropped my duffel bag on the other bed, and clearly assumed that my answer was going to be ‘yes.’ Without any hesitation, she unzipped the bag. “Umm, Annie?”

I didn’t know what to make of her tone until I saw what was sitting on top of all my packed outfits. Pull-ups. From what it looked like, ALL the pull-ups from the pack at the rest stop, save for the two that I was currently wearing. “That’s-” I stuttered, no doubt blushing as pink as the padded underwear stuffed into my duffel bag. ‘That’s not what it looks like.’ But what did it look like?

God, I was going to kill my sister. It had dawned on me earlier that she probably transferred the babyish underwear from her big purse into my bag when she was moving things around in the trunk, and this just confirmed my suspicion. Then, I had been worried about our parents seeing it as a confirmation of Kate’s story. The idea she had teased me with so I would get in the car while wearing the pull-ups that had been soaked by her yellow sports drink. Now? I had completely forgotten about my bag amidst everything that had happened over the last hour. And now, Luna was seeing what I had been trying to keep a secret all day long.

What should I do? I had to say something, and my flustered expression was no doubt betraying any options to play it off like a joke or a prank. “They’re- they’re for babysitting!!” I blurted out. Grasping for straws, and latching onto the job Luna mentioned a minute ago, I racked my brain for a connection to our vacation. It would be one thing to forget underwear like that in my backpack if I was a babysitter, but the pull-ups were literally sitting at the top of my duffel bag. Obviously I would have noticed them while packing. Except, of course, I wasn’t the one who put them in there. That was all Kate.

The look on Luna’s face said everything. She didn’t believe my paper thin excuse for a second, not when it was paired with the surprise and embarrassment of seeing fresh pairs of the underwear that had been an ever growing problem for me since I first put the current ones on. “Do you wet the bed, Annie?” she asked, point blank.

It was like rubbing salt into the wound, though how would Luna know? For a fleeting second, she and her twin had referred to me by ‘Annelise’ when we arrived, but that seemed to be over and done with. Kate had used the nickname enough times recently that it was already sticking. The whole reason I had put on the padded underwear in the first place was to prevent my sister from doing exactly what she was doing.

In the end, it didn’t matter. Thanks to stupidly playing my sister’s games, I wound up in pull-ups AND the childish version of my name.

Part 27

There were a thousand things on my mind, most of which revolved around Kate and all the things I wanted to say to her. First, there were our parents in the car, meaning there was always a risk of being heard over the music. Now, we had the twins. Add our aunt and uncle to the equation, and it was going to take forever before my sister and I would be able to have a private moment.

I couldn’t dwell on any of that, however, when I had more pressing matters to tend to. As in, keeping Luna from figuring out that I was wearing pull-ups in that instant, as well as the fact that they were far from clean.

“Yes,” I reluctantly ‘admitted.’ It might have been stupid and impulsive, but it’s the only thing I could think to do while stuck in a dangerously precarious corner. If I was a ‘bedwetter,’ then there was no reason to suspect my current underwear matched one of the pairs my cousin retrieved from the stack in the bag. “I mean, not all the time,” I clarified. If I was digging my own hole, the least I could do was attempt to keep it shallow. “Kate just made me pack those, just in case.”

In my mind, it was a frustrating concept. My younger sister, having the power to influence what I put into my own suitcase. But it made sense if she was seen as older than me. How on earth were we going to reverse this lie about my age, when this latest development pointed more towards it being the truth to an outside observer?

Luna wasn’t that good at hiding her poker face. I could easily see the gears turning in the teenager’s head. A twelve year old who still wets the bed? Still, she at least had the grace to not make fun of me for it. “Oh. Well, that’s okay. I know a few girls your age that are going through that right now.” An obvious lie.

She began taking everything out of my duffel bag, leaving me to just awkwardly watch as all my clothes were handled by someone else. I offered to help, considering that they were mine, but she shrugged it off the idea pretty easily. Unlike my sister, Luna didn’t appear malicious in her approach. It’s more like she assumed that she knew better, especially after making the point that she had hosted friends in this room before.

All my clothes were sorted into stacks on the bed. In my idly flustered state, something that probably wasn’t going to go away until I was wearing clean underwear and this confusing false reality was undone, I almost didn’t notice. It wasn’t until Luna put my skirts and shorts in a single drawer; the absence of a few outfit pieces, I realized that my bras were nowhere to be seen.

Kate removed those when she added the pull-ups?! I swear, she had only been in the trunk for a few seconds. Then again, it’s not like my bras were on the bottom. Either way, I was instantly frustrated all over again.

“Something wrong, Annie?” Luna asked.

Ugh, I must have been as transparent as she was a second ago. “No,” I said. Not true. Plenty of things were wrong with how my day had gone, which was easily why my thoughts and emotions were all over the place. But that wasn’t Luna’s problem. “I just-” Once again, a good idea came to me way later than it should have. Kate had blocked me before, but now she wasn’t there. “If I can’t help you unpack, can I go say ‘Hi’ to your parents?”

“No, let’s wait for our sisters. Girl to girl, I can totally see your nipples right now. You might not be used to stuff like this yet, but it’s something you need to be aware of from now on. That’s why they’re going to find you a bra. Another option, for your size at least, is to wear a cami underneath another layer. Honestly, you should enjoy being on the smaller side while you can. The rest of us are stuck in bras most days. You have some flexibility.”

And it was right back to the blushing. The worst part was, I knew that Luna would see my rosy cheeks as me being a tween who’s embarrassed to be talking about her changing body. I knew all this already, and looked perfectly presentable before Kate pressured me to take off my bra earlier. Now? Not so much.

Swallowing both my pride and my anger, I managed to give a meek smile in response. “Thanks, Luna.”

“You’re very welcome, Annie! Now, hang tight. I’ll get your clothes sorted, and the others will be back any minute.”

As my cousin continued to move my things from the bed to various drawers and hangers nearby, a quick scan for other possible damage Kate might have done was enough to show me that at least she had left my underwear untouched. If there were only pull-ups, then Luna would eventually notice that. A minute later, footsteps on the stairs announced the return of the others. Kate and Lilah arrived together, and I was back to feeling extra small when standing amidst three taller girls who were related to me. All of whom were younger.

“How’s it going?” Kate asked, “Did little Annie behave herself?”

“Mm hmm,” Luna nodded, “And there’s plenty of space for your clothes, too.”

Well, at least she was somewhat on my side. There had been no mention of the pull-ups, or the fact that I tried to lie about them, but I doubted that would last for long. It was definitely the twin stereotype, but I could already imagine the girls talking about me later. All the more reason to set things straight. “I-”

“Good,” Kate said, “We’ve been working on manners lately. You did thank your cousin for the help, right, sis?”

No matter how hard I tried to keep the hole from getting worse, my sister easily found ways to push me deeper. Thankfully, Luna was on my side once again, even though I hadn’t technically thanked her in regards to the clothes. “She did. She was a very polite girl.”

I’m sure my sister would have loved to witness a ‘thank you’ from my lips at her direction, but she didn’t seem bothered when things went the other way. With a warm smile, she said, “Finally. Good progress, Annie!” Turning to the cousins with a tiny eye roll, she added, “She’s been a bit of a brat ever since puberty kicked in.”

I couldn’t keep things bottled up any more. Deep down, I knew it was a horrible idea, especially with the leverage my sister had on me. But every minute I helped her lean into this lie was just adding to the eventual humiliation that would come when the twins learned my real age. Plus, I could stand the smug look on Kate’s face, or the tiny eye roll she gave in regards to my ‘attitude’ while talking about me when I was right there. “Fuck you, Kate!” I yelled, “I’m not twelve; I’m nineteen.”

There was a long beat of silence, and then all three girls burst into laughter.

I could feel my blush darken, and my temper rose as well. “I’m serious!” I snapped, “Kate’s been screwing with me all day. Just-” Realizing that trying to summarize the whole story would be impossible against their amusement, I went a totally different direction. “Look at my driver’s license! Or school ID.”

“You don’t have a driver’s license, Annie,” Kate said, after another small giggle, “And did our parents give you your ID after registration? I thought they wanted to hold onto it for safekeeping.” Once again turning to the other girls, she explained, “She’s starting middle school in a few weeks. Remember those years?”

“Unfortunately,” Lilah replied. She and Luna seemed to be recovering from the bout of laughter as well. “Rough years. We even tried the whole ‘twinning’ thing for a little while. It was so cringe.”

“SO cringe,” Luna said.

“You’re not listening!” I exclaimed. How could they be laughing? I was trying to restore my actual age. I could suffer through the taunting that would no doubt last all weekend in regards to how they mistook me for a twelve year old at first, but I hadn’t thought about the possibility that they straight up wouldn’t believe me. “Ugh, hold on.” Storming over to my backpack, I went to grab my wallet.

It wasn’t there.

Part 28

“KATE.” Head immediately swiveling in her direction, as it was obvious that she must have found a chance to loot through my other bag, I demanded, “Give my stuff back!” Not just my wallet, as she also still had my phone from earlier. As in, the only other thing that could efficiently showcase my real age.

“What stuff?” Kate asked, feigning innocence and a healthy dose of confusion, “Lilah and I literally just got here. Maybe Luna moved your things?”

“Just her clothes,” Luna shrugged, “Annie, please calm down. What are you missing?”

Groaning and throwing my hands up, while also resisting the urge to scream at the phrase ‘calm down’ when I had every right to be pissed off, I narrowed my eyes at my sister. “My wallet, and my phone.”

“Annie, what are you talking about?” Kate cocked her head to the left, “You don’t get a phone until you turn thirteen.”

“Kate. Enough.” Doing my best to sound serious and stern, I kept my gaze on my sister. “Tell them the truth. Right now.”

Kate just rolled her eyes again, along with a sigh. “The truth? Okay, Annie, here it is. If you want to pretend to be an older girl, you should probably aim for a more believable age. I mean, for real. Nineteen? Look at you!” Approaching me with no warning, she took my hand and gave a sharp tug. I nearly tripped from how many body was abruptly swiveled to the left, and the bulky underwear made me stumble a little thanks to the way I couldn’t fully walk properly. A moment later, I was standing beside my sister in front of the dressing mirror in the corner. “Are you really trying to tell us you’re a college girl, sis?”

I gasped at the sight before me, and the girl next to my sister in the mirror matched my expression. Holy shit. I DID look young. It’s not like I wasn’t aware of my youthful features, as I saw my freckles and not that impressive chest in the mirror every morning, but there were two new pieces here that were really hurting my normally mature image–the pigtails, and the fact that Kate was right there to contrast me in every way as my ‘older sister.’ The one saving grace I had left was my clothes, but even the skirt/tank top combo was something casual I had put on for the drive rather than one of my nicer outfits.

“Umm,” I muttered. Still staring at the girl in the mirror looking back at me, I knew right then and there that nothing I said was going to make the twins believe me. At best, I looked like a young fifteen year old, but I had already been stuck with ‘twelve.’ This was going to be SO embarrassing when they finally learned my real age; now I was caught between somehow proving that I was a college girl, or letting Kate win and playing pretend for a little while longer.

I went with that latter. Once I was out of the pull-ups and my sister had less on me, I’d put myself back together and convince our cousins that I just wanted to see if I could fool them. Taking ownership of the lie would make it less embarrassing. Hopefully.

Kate beat me to the punch this time, however. Giving me an almost imperceptible smirk in the mirror, she turned us back around to face the girls. “So how old did you say you were, Annie?”

Resisting the impulse to take a breath for bravery, as well as the urge to glance away and add ‘shy’ to the list of ways our cousins saw me, I went with the most straightforward option. “I’m twelve years old.” Then, rolling my eyes with a forced smile, I added, “Want me to prove it? My middle school ID is my wallet.” The wallet my brat of a sister fucking took.

“Pretty sure they believe you this time, sis,” Kate giggled, “Now, come on. I’ll help you get sorted with one of these training bras, and then we can all go play Mini Golf.”

Mini Golf? I turned to Kate in surprise. But that would mean . . .

“It was Lilah’s idea!” she said. Barely even looking at me, or acknowledging the fact that an outing would even further delay the shower and clean underwear I so desperately needed, Kate walked over to the plastic box she and Lilah had walked into the room with a few minutes ago. Popping open the lid, it didn’t take long for her to find the small stack of training bras. “Perfect. Oh, maybe some of these clothes will fit Annie, too. Her wardrobe is so blah.”

Excuse me? I narrowed my eyes at Kate, but there were too many girls in the room for the annoyed silence I had hoped for.

“Blah, how?” Luna asked, “There were some cute clothes in her bag.”

Fucking ‘thank you.’

Kate just shrugged. “I don’t know. It just always feels like she’s trying to be all grown-up. You never wear anything fun and bright, Annie!” Finally talking to me, rather than at me, she pulled out a sky blue t-shirt with a pink flower centered a few inches below the neckline. “How about this? I know you love blue.”

Yeah, like regular blue. As in, the kind that looks good with red hair. Not the kind of shirt that I literally remember old classmates of mine wearing in early middle school. “No, thanks,” I replied. It had taken enough energy to claim my ‘real age’ with a smile on my face, but I wasn’t about to pretend I liked all the things a tween girl would allegedly like. “My clothes are fine.”

“Tell you what, sis,” Kate said. Pulling a pair of jean shortalls from the box as well, she held up the shirt to make it a combo. “Why don’t you pick out one of your outfits, and we’ll do a little fashion show? Luna, Lilah? You two should choose something for Annie to try. Four choices total, and we’ll vote on the best for her to wear!”

Wait, what? I didn’t agree to that. And I had never worn shortalls before. Even when I was younger, I thought it was an immature look. But no matter what the twins pulled from their box of old clothes, Kate was basically setting up a situation where she would get to see me in a bunch of outfits they had worn when they were smaller. Plus she had already taken a picture of me when I spilled that drink all over myself. This would be yet another photo opportunity.

‘Oh NO.’ My heart began racing when I thought about a bigger problem. I was wearing two pull-ups that had a considerable sag on top of the original bulk. My current skirt was long enough to hide them, and the shortalls would probably be thick enough to mask things as well. But what if one of the twins picked out something that didn’t work with my ongoing, mortifying situation?

Suddenly, Mini Golf sounded a lot better in comparison. “But-”

“That’s a great idea!” Luna exclaimed. “It’ll be like shopping, but without those pesky price tags. Besides, Lilah and I have great taste. I’m sure you’ll like at least some of our stuff, Annie.”

Based on what Kate had found so far, I wasn’t so sure about the claim. Their current ensembles were good, to be fair, but this was older stuff. Less fashionable stuff. And the last thing I wanted to do was be their little doll while feigning that I was a tween. “No, let’s do Mini Golf,” I countered, “Before it gets dark out.”

“Oh, they have lights over there,” Lilah said, “We can go whenever.”

Crap.

Kate brought it home. “Come on, Annie; loosen up. How about this? If you step out of your comfort zone and try on a few new things, I’ll help you with that favor you were asking for earlier. Then again, you’re a big girl. I’m sure you’ll figure it out on your own!”

I could feel my cheeks flush as she hinted at the humiliating secret I was determined to keep. While it wasn’t a threat to let the other girls know, the reminder of that possibility was enough to make me more open to the suggestion currently on the table. Plus the only ‘plan’ I had so far was to wait until everyone else was asleep, so I could shower and dispose of the used pull-ups deep in the garage trash can. However, that would not only require a bit of risk in an unfamiliar house, but also meant that I would be stuck without a change for hours. If Kate had a better idea, I was all ears.

“What favor?” Luna asked.

That tipped me over the edge. “Fine, whatever,” I said, “I’ll try on some outfits.”

Part 29

Our cousins were more than happy to dig through the box of old clothes the moment that I agreed.

It was pretty easy to tell that they were less excited about dressing me up and more interested in taking a trip down memory lane. They fawned over every other article of clothing pulled out of the box, and occasionally giggled and groaned over some of the not so stylish things they wore in their awkward tween years. Admittedly, I could see a small handful of potential outfits I could see my younger self wearing, but none of them really fit my college look.

“Hey, Annie?” Kate set the outfit she had already picked out down on the end of the bed while getting my attention. “Earth to Annie. You need to pick one of your own outfits to show off! Need some help?” Not waiting for a reply, she took my hand and dragged me over to the dresser where my clothes had been organized for me.

It wasn’t exactly the moment alone I had hoped for with my sister, as the twins were right across the room, but it was something. Starting with my distaste for the touchy-feely sister thing, I pinched the back of her hand with my nails while lowering my voice to a whisper. “Kate-”

Right away, she shushed me.

Despite all the patronizing ways she had already treated me, on top of the lies our cousins believed at the moment, I was instantly frustrated all over again. I hated–and I mean hated–being shushed. No matter the context. It was rude, and insensitive, and never as playful or funny as some girls thought. Which made it all the more obnoxious when Kate was doing it while pretending she was my older sister.

“No. Listen to-”

“Sssshhhhh.” Kate placed a finger to my lips. It was reminiscent of the way she tapped on the pacifier earlier, and the smirk on her face told me she knew exactly what she was doing. Even though we weren’t close as sisters, she still knew about my little idiosyncrasies. This one included. “Stop being so moody. Do you want my help or not, Annie?”

Swallowing my pride, I gave one of those meek nods from before. Partly because I did want her help, and partly because I wanted this moment to be over before our cousins noticed how I was being treated.

“Then behave,” she said, “Smile more. Giggle. Act like the little tween you look like, and I’ll help you. Okay?”

I wanted to slap her. Except since she was saying everything in a smug murmur, and our cousins wouldn’t be able to interpret the devious look in her eyes like I could, doing something like that would only make me look like I had no control of my emotions. Instead, I was going to have to look immature in a totally different way. God, I was going to kill her for this.

Was it too late to run downstairs and beg our aunt and uncle for help? I was too scared of Kate chasing me and yanking down my skirt.

Pushing an exaggerated and pretty clearly forced smile on my face, I asked, “Like this?” My voice was dripping with sarcasm.

“Something like that,” Kate replied. She took her hand away from my lips while rolling her eyes. Not satisfied, apparently, she pressed for more. “Now show me your best girly giggle.”

Give an inch, lose a mile. Just like with the pull-ups, I had put myself in a situation where it felt easier to just do what Kate wanted. Otherwise, the smile would have been for nothing. Plastering another fake smile on my face, I gave her my best impression of a ditzy girl flirt-laughing.

Blushing immediately at the sound I normally wouldn’t be caught dead doing, my smile faded and I waited for Kate’s approval. That was more than enough, wasn’t it?

“God, you’re so CUTE.” Flicking one of my pigtails, she leaned in with that same confident smirk to speak as quietly as she did with some of her demeaning directives back in the car. “Keep it up, little sis. If you can last through the fashion show, maybe we can get you sorted before mini golf. What do you say?”

There were a lot of things that I wanted to say, but I pushed down all of them. “I am, like, SO excited to try everything on!” Disgusting. As a college girl, I had absolutely no idea how to feign being the age Kate was presenting me as. Or that I was presenting myself as, though I wasn’t thinking of it like that. I just kept leaning into the valley girl thing, with some extra pep to sell the immaturity.

“Much better,” Kate nodded. Finally stepping away and giving me a little personal space, she retrieved a folded white garment from her back pocket. “Now, first things first. Do you know how to put one of these on?”

Fuck.

I had forgotten all about the initial reason she and Lilah had gone downstairs. The training bra in Kate’s hand was meant for me, and there was no way I could talk myself out of it after literally just agreeing to keep up appearances until I made it through all the outfits picked out for me. Plus, the girls were right. Although I was small in the chest department, I still needed something to wear underneath any given outfit. And, since my bras were no doubt stashed away in Kate’s bags, I didn’t really have another option at the moment.

“Of course I do,” I muttered. Belatedly realizing how quickly the scowl formed on my face to go along with my annoyance, I quickly transformed it back into a cheery smile. Oof, the whole ‘attitude’ thing was going to have to be a conscious effort, especially when it came to my sister needling me. “Like, duh!” I added, giggling almost as a way to apologize for screwing up a moment ago.

“You sure you don’t my help?” Kate asked, “Why don’t you lift your arms? I can get that boring tank top off for you.”

“That’s okay,” I replied. As expected, it was painfully difficult to keep the girly smile going while my sister was clearly trying to make things difficult for me. The last thing I needed was her stripping me right in front of our cousins, even if I could already hear her claiming that we’re all girls and all related, so it’s not a big deal. The only way I could think to get her off my back was by letting her ‘win.’ I took a step back, just in case, not wanting to give her the chance to get a grip on my top. “I’m twelve years old, Kate. I, like, totally know what I’m doing!”

Based on her amused grin, it worked.

“Oh, Annie, this is going to be so much fun!” She handed me the plain white bra. “Hop to it, little sis. We want to play dress up with you.” With another flick of the same pigtail, she practically skipped away to join our cousins and check out what they were selecting for me to try on.

I let out a heavy sigh and turned around. My smile disappeared completely, and I mentally cursed out my brat of a sister. After making sure that the mirror in the corner wouldn’t reflect me in the slightest, I reluctantly peeled off my tank top. Facing away from the other three was the most privacy that I was going to get, though I still felt a blush coming on from my temporary exposure. Belatedly panicking at the thought of the pull-ups poking out of my skirt without the top to hide them, I was relieved to see that everything was fine. Except, of course, the fact that I was wearing pull-ups in the first place.

The last time I had worn a training bra was, well, in middle school. But it was better than being fully topless. Wincing a little bit at the plain white undergarment, as it looked so cheap and boring compared to my stylish and expensive bras, I put it on before I could change my mind.

Right away, I could feel the problem; it was way too small. While the material was admittedly more comfortable than a normal bra, there was a noticeable tightness around my chest once I had it in place. Adjusting the thing in an attempt to make it better, I gasped at the sight waiting for me when I looked down.

They made me look totally flat.

Part 30

Almost flat as a board.

If anything, my actual boobs had been replaced by the barely existent curve that the training bra had built into it. Not only did I have less to show in the chest department than usual, but the too-small fit was an extra frustration. After everything leading up to this, I immediately suspected that Kate did this on purpose. But once again, I was stuck. Blaming her would only make me look immature all over; I had already been called out for ‘pretending,’ and the twins didn’t know my sister like I did. Without proof, I couldn’t point fingers.

“Let’s take a look.” Kate appeared over my shoulder out of nowhere. Whatever fleeting thoughts I had of yanking the bra off and demanding something else vanished when I was put on the spot. Using both hands to roughly swivel me around, Kate gave me the most innocent smile. It was even more annoying that she was doing it when our cousins couldn’t see her. There was no need for the act, and yet she persisted. “Looks like a perfect fit! And hey, no more nipples. How does it feel, Annie?”

Another fight or flight moment. Even though I had already resolved to begrudgingly play along with whatever it took to expedite all of this in the name of getting changed, I was constantly tempted to take a different approach whenever Kate pulled shit like this. It was a lose/lose. Either I gave her an excuse to drag this out, or I kept digging myself deeper.

Choosing the latter, I pushed an overly cheery smile on my face. “Fine, I guess. Let’s try on some outfits!”

Right away, Kate smirked. “That’s the spirit, little sis. Here, come take a look at what we have for you.”

As irritating as my sister’s expressions were, I almost would have preferred staying face to face with her in comparison to the mortifying exposure that came next. The moment she stepped aside and placed a hand on my back to ‘helpfully’ nudge me forward with her, I realized just what our cousins were seeing. Instead of a mature college girl who got into the car with a push-up bra and a flawlessly mature appearance, I was Kate’s ‘tween’ sister who apparently needed fashion advice. And now, yet another piece of my maturity had been stripped away from me–this time, literally.

I could feel my cheeks begin to heat up as I realized this was the first time in years anyone had seen me without the support of my padding. At least, with the lights on. I wasn’t a total prude, even if Kate presumed as much, but guys tended to miss details like that when in a more horizontal position.

It wasn’t the first time the thought had crossed my mind, but it was a LOT more present now–since our cousins were seeing me in such a flat state, my normal ensemble didn’t matter any more. Even when I got my stuff back, Luna and Lilah would know that my boobs were ‘all in the bra,’ no matter what I wore.

“Well, what do you think, Annie?” Kate asked. She walked me to the edge of the bed that was covered in clothes at this point. It was easy to see which three outfits were for me, as one of them was the hideous one my sister had already held up. That, and all three were neatly laid out in comparison to the surrounding chaos of dismissed options. “Do you have a favorite?”

No. I didn’t. My ‘favorite’ was always going to be the fourth outfit, the one that I chose. It might have been too late for that, however, as I had dawdled too long changing into the training bra and never got a chance to find something that would impress the girls while simultaneously covering the pull-ups I was stuck in. I hadn’t been paying any attention to the conversation across the room a minute ago, but maybe Kate finally covered for me. The two other outfits had skirts, rather than anything that would have been impossible to wear over the bulky underwear. Of course, that benefited her as well, since she could keep dangling the secret over my head without any extra complications.

As for what was laid out for me, I was surprisingly in favor of Kate’s choice compared to the others. The first option was a pink tulle skirt and a plain white top, but the bottom half alone was enough to make me almost vomit in disgust. The second actually had a decently cute skirt, but the striped top was almost as bad as the skirt before it. The only issue with Kate’s was the super immature look, but at least it was a more casual combination.

I hesitated, not quite sure what to say. Even if my sister’s selection might have been the least painful to look at, I didn’t exactly want to give her the satisfaction of admitting I liked hers the best.

For once, I was glad Kate spoke before I had the chance to. “Really, Luna?” she asked. Stepping over and fiddling with the tulle material, she gave our cousin a teasing smile, “Not exactly a mini golf outfit.”

“Yeah, but we’re going out for dinner tomorrow. This would look super cute with the red hair!”

“Oh, perfect. Good choice, then; pink is Annie’s favorite color!”

“Really?” Luna smiled, “You can totally have all my old pink stuff.”

It took everything in me to keep the idle smile on my face. Despite how pink was very much my least favorite color, I made myself commit to the sickening girly girl act. “Oh my God, really?” I asked. The only way to stop standing there in the degrading bra was to push through. Flashing her a big smile, kept leaning into filler words that I normally wouldn’t be caught dead using. “You’re, like, totally the best. Like, seriously!”

“Really,” she said, “Here, I can start making a pink pile.”

“And I can help little Annie get changed. This one first, then?” Kate asked. Answering the question herself, she picked up the tulle skirt off the bed. “Come on, sis. There’s a bathroom down the hall.”

Finally.

Loath as I was to dress myself up like that, this was going to be the first chance for Kate and I to have a real conversation. We couldn’t get into much in the car without the risk of our parents overhearing, and the twins answered the door before any conversational progress could be made outside. Granted, a closed bathroom door still didn’t guarantee privacy in terms of a verbal conversation, but I could whisper-shout my grievances as easily as I could yell them.

Following Kate out of the bedroom after giving the back of my skirt a nervous tug or two in the hopes nothing was poking out from underneath the skirt, I felt self conscious all over again when I stepped out into the hall. Even though it wasn’t my bedroom, the act of leaving the privacy of a room while being half topless affected me all the same. Hurrying to match Kate’s stride, I scurried into the bathroom and shut the door behind us before anyone else could see the humiliating state of my chest.

A cramped bathroom wasn’t exactly the ideal place to do it, but I was still ready to face off with my sister. This had gone SO much further than what was supposed to be a simple dare that was embarrassing enough to begin with, and she still wasn’t letting up.

Except I never got the chance to say anything. The moment I turned around, Kate shoved the pacifier in my mouth.

“Mmm!” Whining into the plastic and silicone, my reflexive squirming didn’t do much when she was actively pushing it against my mouth. I was also half stuck between her and the closed bathroom door, though I still raised my hands and made the effort to push her back.

“NO.” Abruptly reaching under my skirt, Kate grabbed the pull-ups and roughly pushed them up before shifting them forward and back to create the most horrifying massage of my own mess. “Hold still, you fucking twelve year old brat.”

My strength evaporated immediately. I was not prepared for the aggression, or the disgusting sensations, or the harshness in Kate’s eyes and voice. Squirming more in discomfort than protest for a moment, I dropped my arms and let my sister do whatever she wanted.

“Good girl,” Kate said. “You know, all I really wanted was for our cousins to see you in pull-ups. But God, you just made everything else so easy. It’s almost like you want to be my little sister.”

Part 31

With wide eyes, I vigorously shook my head back and forth. That was NOT what I wanted. “Kate-” I began, though it was difficult to even get that much out with the way she was pushing the childish accessory against my lips.

“No.” Practically growling in response, she shoved the plastic ring forward and gave another horrifying massage-like rub against my pelvis with the dirty pull-ups. I stiffened and shut up immediately; her cruel movements stopped in response, but her stern gaze remained. “When your pacifier is in, you aren’t allowed to talk. Remember?”

Of course. The helpless experience in the car was recent enough, although it was nothing compared to the current moment. Nodding my head with watery eyes, I prayed she would let up. How had I let things come to this?! Technically, Kate never made me do anything. I made each choice for myself. But that didn’t mean that I actually wanted something as ridiculous as being her younger sister; I just kept choosing what sounded like the best option compared to the alternatives she provided.

“Good girl,” Kate repeated. She took her hand off the pacifier, but kept her grip down below. “Now, suck on your tit and listen up.”

I did as I was told, blushing a bit at the crass term.

Going on, Kate said, “Now, I’m tired of you acting out. If you still want my help dealing with your not so little problem, you’re going to behave from here on out. Understand?”

Affirming with another awkward nod, I nervously sucked on the pacifier and willed myself to meet her eyes instead of glancing away in embarrassment.

“That’s what I thought. Now, since you clearly didn’t get it the first time, here’s what’s going to happen: You are going to be a little ball of fun during your fashion show. I want you to smile, and giggle like a schoolgirl, and be ANNIE. Like, really sell it. Can you manage that, sis?”

It was the same directive as before, but the stakes felt a lot higher now. Considering my sister’s no nonsense attitude at the moment, this could very well be my last chance to keep my mortifying secret between just the two of us. And in order to do so, I had to be a bubbly tween? It went against my normal nature in every possible way. Despite my reservations, I found myself nodding.

“Good. If you’re the cutest little sister in the whole world, you might even get a change before mini golf. Now, how about a little practice?” Kate finally removed her hand from below my skirt, and used the other to pop the pacifier out of my mouth. Stepping back with an idle smile, she asked, “Are you ready for your fashion show, Annie?”

With almost no time to get into character, I simply blurted out the most extreme version of what she was asking for. “Like, oh my God, YES.” Pushing a big smile on my face, and wanting the floor to swallow me up as my sister smiled victoriously towards the sudden burst of energy, I persevered when that wish didn’t come true. “I’m, like, so excited.”

“That’s a much better attitude for a girl your size, sis. And you just gave me a really fun idea! Why don’t we give you a quota? You need to say ‘like’ at least five hundred times before we get back from mini golf. I’ll be counting!”

Wait, what? My smile shrunk for a moment at just how stupid and childish that would make me sound, but of course that’s probably why she thought of it as ‘really fun.’ In a small act of rebellion, I forced the smile back and agreed with, “Like, that’s like, such a, like, good idea. Like, seriously!”

Kate just rolled her eyes. “Nice try, brat. The count stays at zero until the twins are with us. And it’s always paused when it’s just the two of us, even after that. Okay?”

The only way to stop myself from arguing was to go in the completely opposite direction in the name of survival. Awkwardly giggling instead, I agreed with an overly enthusiastic, “Okay!”

“Like the little sister I always wanted,” Kate smirked, “Keep it up. Your count might pause when we’re alone, but not your lovely attitude. That can stay!”

“Of course, sis!”

“Now take off your skirt, Annie. And then you’ll need some help getting dressed, right?”

Fuck me. I managed to get away with doing the bra myself, but Kate was clearly prompting me to answer the way she wanted. “Umm, yeah,” the giggle was fake, but the nerves behind it were real, “I guess I could use a little help.”

As I began removing the last part of my original outfit of the day, I belatedly realized that this would be the first time either of us would be seeing the pull-ups on me by themselves. So far, I had managed to keep myself covered, even after the humiliating process of wetting myself and then worse. Unfortunately, it was too late to stop. Not only had I already partially pulled the skirt down, but I had literally just agreed to be a ‘ball of fun’ with a good attitude. I wasn’t in the best position to argue or backtrack.

At least making sure that Kate wasn’t pulling out her phone, even though I was pretty sure she had left it in the bedroom, I reluctantly worked the skirt past the bulky underwear that made the undressing process more difficult than if I had simply been wearing panties. Blushing as pink as the pull-ups that came into view, I quickly shifted my legs and let gravity drop the skirt to my ankles before my embarrassment caused me to yank them back up for protection.

“Oh, Annie,” Kate frowned, “Wow, you really filled those up, didn’t you?”

NO. It was a weird thought to have, but even wetting and messing myself shouldn’t have caused the considerable sag that I could see and feel a lot more clearly now that Kate was directly pointing it out. But we had poured a whole bottle of yellow sports drink down the pull-ups before getting settled in the car. If anything, it was all that extra liquid that was weighing them down. Or maybe it was just easier telling myself that, since I didn’t want to believe that my own mess was the culprit.

Oh no. I was supposed to have a nonstop good attitude. It was one thing when talking about trying on new outfits, but this?

No girl ever, nineteen or twelve, would have an upbeat demeanor about something so awful. Except me, apparently. “It’s fine!” Stepping out of my skirt with a hesitant grin, I said, “It was just a little accident. Nothing a shower can’t fix!” Take the hint, sis. If she hadn’t made the point earlier about the pull-ups being tricky to dispose of without being caught, I would be running the water right now so I could jump in. My salvation was so close, and yet so far.

“Hmm, I don’t know. Maybe I should make a pass with some wet wipes first. I have a bunch of babysitting experience, remember? And you might miss a spot without my help.”

Was that actually what she had in mind? No way. Letting her see me undressed like this was bad enough; the last thing I needed was my smug sister getting the chance to witness me in an even worse state. “It’s fine, really!” Leaning harder into the immature roleplay in an attempt to appease her, I let out an obnoxiously girly giggle compared to the previous one. “Like, I have accidents, like, all the time! Don’t worry, I know how to clean myself up.”

“All the time?” Kate echoed, “Is that why you packed all those pull-ups?”

“Mm hmm,” I nodded, “Just in case.”

The way her face lit up was not a good sign. Anything that was fun and exciting for Kate was rarely those things for me. “Well, you should probably wear them for the rest of the weekend, then. Like, 24/7, until I can trust that you’re potty trained.”

Part 32

There wasn’t much fight left in me at that point.

Standing there in just the pull-ups and a tiny training bra made me feel self conscious and vulnerable, and the bathroom felt noticeably cramped with me and my sister in there behind the closed door. I made a weak attempt to giggle and dismiss her idea, but she was as pushy as ever. It didn’t take long for me to agree that wearing pull-ups all weekend was a good idea. With a smile on my face, no less.

“I promise to wear my pull-ups all weekend,” I finally said for her. Not only giving her my word, but awkwardly using the possessive word this time around. Because according to Kate, ‘When you wear something, it’s yours.’ After a little more prodding, I added on, “Or longer. I’ll wear my pull-ups until I’m fully potty trained.”

“That’s a good little sister!” Kate exclaimed, “Now, let’s get you into one of these outfits. Hop to it, Annie! The girls will start wondering what’s taking us so long.”

That was the last thing I needed–a knock on the door when I was still undressed in the worst way possible. I half expected Kate to insist that she should be the one to dress me, but apparently she was content with my attitude shift. The only way she stepped in was to decide the order for me; most normal outfit to most embarrassing. She didn’t actually say that, but it didn’t take a genius to figure it out. After dealing with yet another instance of the dirty pull-ups shifting as I put on the simple skirt and wriggled it over the heavy padding, Kate did end up stepping in when the striped skirt was halfway down my chest.

She appeared right in front of me as my head emerged from the top, and took the hem of the shirt to pull it down the rest of the way. “Remember to smile, Annie! Even if you don’t have boobs,” out of nowhere, she grabbed my breasts and pinched the nipples through the top and training bra, “And even if you have accidents all the time!” Dropping her hands right away, she gripped the front of the skirt and pull-ups and gave two teasing upward shakes.

An insensitive fucking test. Rather than shoving her away and screaming, especially at the audacity of touching my chest while simultaneously insulting me, I just pushed a dorky grin onto my face instead. “Of course I don’t have boobs. I’m only twelve!” It was meant to show that she wasn’t bothering me, but I once again found the blush creeping up from the bubbly energy I was giving off.

“That’s right,” Kate smirked, “Stepping back. You’re twelve years old, Annie. No wait, that doesn’t sound right. I thought you were nineteen?”

“No, I’m twelve!” I replied. Could we just go? At some level, I knew I was playing right into her hands, but I just wanted to get this whole fashion show over with. And that meant escaping round one in the bathroom. “Like, I’m literally starting 6th grade this fall.”

“Oh? What school are you attending?”

“Fraser Middle School.”

“Fun! That’s where I went. I’m sure you’ll have a good time there.”

Obviously. That’s where we both went. Resisting another urge to roll my eyes, I used a giggle to push away that impulse, “Yeah, I’m SO excited.”

“And you won’t even need to go shopping for outfits. Luna and Lilah should have plenty to tide you over!”

“I know!” A slightly smaller smile at the thought. Surely I’d get out of this mess before the end of the weekend; no, by the end of the day. Right? Our aunt and uncle would clear things up, and I was already mentally preparing for how I could try to play this whole thing off as a joke. “Should we go show them my super cute outfit?!”

“Sure! Lead the way, little sis?”

Well, at least she wasn’t holding my hand this time. I opened the bathroom door and stepped out into the hall, taking a quiet breath as we approached the bedroom. The twins were gossiping about something boy-related, but I could guess that their attention would be back on me in a matter of seconds. Smile. Smile, smile, smile. It was so unnatural to keep the overly happy expression on my face under the current circumstances, and I could already tell that I would have to use the giggles as a crutch to maintain it.

I had already dug this hole for myself, using the shovel Kate kept pushing into my hands; it was too late to climb out now. Turning the corner, I gave my brightest smile as I asked, “Well? What do you think?”

“It’s great, Annie!” Lilah replied, “Almost as great as it looked on me in middle school.”

“Umm, pretty sure that was my outfit, sis!” Luna replied.

“Was it? Well, anything that looks good on you automatically looks good on me.”

“Go on, little sis,” Kate said, “Give us a runway walk. All the way down the room, then turn and pose.”

Making a conscious effort to keep the bubbly attitude on the surface, I let out another cringey giggle before doing as I was told. Walking forward, I also had to actively make each step look as normal as possible despite the bulk that threatened to cause more of a waddle if I did anything but clamp the pull-ups between my thighs as I moved. Getting to a spot I deemed acceptable, I swiveled 180 degrees and placed a hand on my hip as the braided pigtails swayed from the sharp turn.

I flashed the cutest grin I could muster, only to find three separate cameras pointed at me. Were they taking pictures, or videos?! Either way, my excited/girly demeanor almost cracked at the thought that all three of them would have evidence of my ‘twelve year old’ self even after the truth came out.

“Come back over here, Annie,” Kate said.

As badly as I wanted to demand that they all delete whatever they just took, that would obviously go against the personality I was trying to pull off. “Yes?” I asked, walking back over without making a fuss.

Kate repositioned me in front of her and placed her hands on my shoulders so we could both face the twins. “How old are you, Annie?”

“Twelve . . .” I replied, with only a hint of hesitation.

They both looked a little confused, which Kate must have noticed as well. “We’re trying to teach little Annie that there’s a fine line between playing pretend and being seen as a compulsive liar. You’re not a liar, are you, sis?”

I knew exactly what she was doing. And yet, I simply shook my head. I had already seen myself in the mirror, and that was before putting on this immature outfit. Even if I tried to blurt out the truth again, they would once again believe my sister over me. She was both reinforcing my ‘age’ AND the fact that apparently lying was a habit of mine.

“Then why don’t you tell us how old you are,” Kate continued.

What else could I say? Luna and Lilah were looking at me expectantly, and Kate’s hands on my shoulders didn’t help. “I’m twelve years old,” I said.

“Luna, can you ask her?”

“Sure! How old are you, Annie?”

It was SO patronizing! Especially coming from my teenage cousin. Lightly blushing, I glanced away and muttered, “Twelve . . .”

“Speak up, Annie,” Kate said.

A bit more clearly, I repeated, “I’m twelve.”

Lilah jumped in next. “How old are you, Annie? The whole thing!”

“I’m twelve years old.”

Both girls just giggled, looking and sounding very much like the twins they were as their expressions temporarily matched. “She’s so cute, Kate!” Luna said, “I wish I had a little sister. We’d play dress up ALL the time.”

“You can borrow her this weekend if you want,” Kate said, “Although fair warning, she can be a bit of a handful sometimes! Anyway, Annie, are you ready to try on the next outfit.”

“Totally!” I exclaimed. God, my voice was disgusting. Leaning into the role despite how I knew that it would feed into the new round of Kate’s lies, I added, “Umm, like, which one?”

“The pink skirt!” Lilah replied, “If it fits, you’ll have something to wear tomorrow night.”

Tomorrow night? I didn’t know anything about tomorrow night, although I had been told to bring something nice. And I did–something actually my style. Kate didn’t hint one way or another if she knew what they were talking about. She just said, “Okay! Come on, Annie.”

Still determined to make this go by as quickly as possible, I simply let her take my hand and walk me out of the room.

Smiling and obedient.

Part 33

The next outfit instantly made me wish that I could have stayed in the first one.

As I looked myself over in the mirror while wearing the pink tulle skirt and satin white top, all I could think of was how reminiscent it was of little girls running around at a princess party. Granted, the one I was wearing was slightly more classy and grown up in its design, but the girl looking back at me with her pigtails and freckles was nothing at all like the adult image I had of myself. Still, I managed to keep a soft smile and affirm how pretty the outfit was at Kate’s direction.

Showcasing myself for the twins was about the same. I kept up the bubbly/girly attitude the whole time, struck a few poses, and inwardly stressed about the second round of pictures and videos all three girls were taking. It would have been tough enough to steal one phone after successfully glancing over a shoulder to get the password. But three? There was no way. Besides, I was willing to bet Kate was saving them in multiple places, just in case. That was totally her style.

The third outfit was hands down the most ‘middle school’ of them all. It was Kate’s selection; shortalls and a light blue tee. Of all the outfits I had tried, this one was easily the least flattering on my body. My chest disappeared even more behind the layers, and my thighs looked particularly twig-like when contrasting with the thick denim resting around my pull-ups. Kate immediately brought attention to how my pigtails were perfect with an outfit like this.

“How old are you, Annie?” she asked, turning me away from the mirror to look up at her.

With zero hesitation this time, I smiled and said, “I’m twelve years old.”

“And you’re my little sister?”

“Like, totally!”

Kate just smirked. “And don’t you ever forget it.”

We walked back to the bedroom together, and I did yet another embarrassing runway walk and allowed the girls to take more pictures and videos for their collection. I was most nervous about the pull-ups this time around; since I knew what I was wearing, the bulk seemed super obvious underneath the shortalls. Neither of the twins said anything, however, so maybe it was just me being paranoid.

Since this was the last outfit, I was encouraged to do a few more poses than before. Every single one of them was complete with a big smile, or sometimes a giggle as I forced myself to be amused at whatever one of the girls suggested. Little by little, it was getting easier to maintain the bubbly attitude, although there was still a healthy amount of internal cringing at the same time.

When the girls were done playing with their ‘pretty little doll,’ as my sister put it–in that usual way that was lighthearted on the surface, but doubled as a jab towards me–my hopes of finally getting changed were dashed yet again. First, outside the house. And now, while I was the center of attention. “Why don’t you wear this one to mini golf?” Kate suggested, “You look so cute!”

My eyes slightly widened when I realized the implication of her ‘innocent’ suggestion. If I stayed in the shortalls, then how would I get out of the messy pull-ups before we left? “Umm, like . . .” I trailed off. Without giving away the situation I had worked so hard to keep a secret, and while needing to keep the giggly tween facade up, what could I even say in response?? “Okay!” I exclaimed. Maybe it was a test. Kate wanted to see if I could maintain the attitude of her ‘little sister’ in the face of something that didn’t particularly make me want to smile. Still, I couldn’t resist trying at least a little bit to get out of it. “You don’t mind?” I asked Luna and Lilah, in regards to me wearing their old clothes.

“Of course not!” Luna exclaimed, “What’s ours is yours, Annie.”

“Really? Thank you!!” My face flushed at how overly excited I ended up sounding in response. It was mostly because I was trying so hard not to revert back into how Annelise would react to all of this. My instincts managed to push down any lingering frustrations, however, and I leaned into the demeaning role by clasping my hands together. “And I’m, like, so excited for mini golf! It’ll be so fun!” Happy, Kate?

“I can drive,” Lilah said, “Are we good to go right now? Honestly, you and Annie don’t even need to bring anything. I can just pay for all of us!”

I glanced towards Kate, waiting for her to say something. Instead of making an excuse for us to wait a few minutes, she just thanked Lilah and said that we’d pay her back sometime this weekend with another activity. Apparently I was in charge of reminding Kate about our deal. “Umm, can I use the restroom before we go?” I asked. Oh God, I was literally asking for permission.

“Go ahead, Annie.” Kate gestured to the bedroom door. “We don’t mind waiting a minute or two for you!”

But . . . That wasn’t fair! Even if I had the bathroom all to myself, it wouldn’t be good enough. Kate explained as much on the front porch. There was no way to efficiently clean myself up without a shower or some major wiping, and neither of those things could be done in the time it would take to simply go to the restroom. And then, where was I going to put the pull-ups afterwards? Once again, I was stuck, and Kate knew it.

Was it better to cut my losses? Prove my real age, and suffer the consequences when Kate took that as an excuse to reveal my mortifying underwear situation? My compliance had already resulted in all those pictures. What if going along with this for even longer wasn’t the best idea?

“Okay!” I replied, still with a smile, “Be right back.”

Stepping out into the hallway, I paused a few feet down the hall and listened for Kate. I was hoping she would give a clever excuse to follow me, but she just asked the twins about how school was going for them. Sighing to myself, I put my impulsive plan into action. This was going to be an awful band-aid to rip off, but clearly Kate wasn’t the answer to my ongoing problem. Not when she knew that she was both the only one who could help and also the one who could make things so much worse.

Padding down the hall, and then taking the stairs to the first floor while hoping the couple of creaks along the way wouldn’t cause anyone to come after me, I quietly walked from room to room instead of calling anything out. Hearing sounds in the kitchen, I turned that corner next and found my aunt chopping some vegetables on the island. She could actually help. We didn’t really know each other, but she would at least know that I was Kate’s older sister. And her daughters would take her word over Kate’s.

“Aunt Miranda?” I said, flushing when it hit me that my first impression with her would be in my childish get-up.

“Oh, Annie!” Looking up from her prepping, she took me in for a moment. “Wow, Kate wasn’t kidding. You could have fooled me.”

“Umm, nice to see you,” I mumbled. Instead of broaching the subject I wanted, I found myself distracted by what she said, “And what do you mean? With Kate?”

“Don’t worry, dear. She explained everything. For the record, I think it’s a fun idea! And a really interesting experiment.”

An- an experiment? The pieces weren’t quite coming together, save for the fact that apparently Kate had already talked to our aunt. When?! “Wait, hold on,” I said, head spinning. That’s right. When Kate went down to help bring up the boxes of clothes, she easily could have stolen a minute with Aunt Miranda. “I mean, I’m not- Kate didn’t- This wasn’t my idea!”

“Oh, was it Kate’s?” Aunt Miranda asked, “Either way, it’s fine. Luna and Lilah barely remember you two. And trust me, the makeover is super convincing. You can be twelve all weekend, Annie. Or, at least until you decide to tell the girls.”

I was surprised, to say the least. What was going on?!

Speaking of Kate, her voice sounded from upstairs a second later. “Annie? Where’d you go?”

Part 34

Before I could push for a more detailed explanation or, better yet, find a way to get our aunt on my side like I came down to achieve in the first place, Kate was barging in and making everything difficult. Like usual.

“We’re in the kitchen!” Aunt Miranda called out in response to Kate’s question.

“Coming!”

What could I even do?! I couldn’t blurt out that I needed help; not when Kate was now within earshot and would no doubt find a way to twist my words. Besides, it was still difficult to think through how much of this was Kate’s fault vs. my own. There was a lot I could have done to prevent both the literal and metaphorical mess I was in. And yet, in retrospect, most of my own choices led to my current situation.

But I had to say something, right? I had to try! “Aunt Miranda, I don’t want to be twelve!” I said. It was the easiest way to express myself without knowing the whole story and without getting into all the complicated details about why I was sporting pigtails and embarrassingly immature shortalls.

“Oh good, you’re getting into character!” Kate exclaimed. Turning the corner with a friendly smile on her face, she walked right up to me and draped her arm over my shoulder, “I mean, let’s be honest. Like, every 6th grader just wants to grow up and fast forward to high school. But you can’t just skip past all the awkward years, Annie! Besides, you made a commitment. This is an all weekend thing, remember? That was the deal!”

“No, that-” I caught myself, blushing deeply when I realized what I was about to say. Only a few minutes ago, I had reluctantly agreed to wear pull-ups all weekend. That didn’t mean I had signed up to be ‘twelve’ for the same time frame, but did it make a difference? Either way, I was on the defensive, and mentioning my current underwear predicament to our aunt meant that our parents would probably hear about it sooner or later. Likely sooner.

“Yes, Annie?” Kate sweetly asked, “Why don’t you show Aunt Miranda your smile, and tell her how old you are?”

Even without a pointed look or a subtle reminder of what she had on me at the moment, I felt compelled to answer Kate the ‘correct’ way. She had harped on my attitude enough upstairs, and the girly attitude was ever so slowly getting more natural through repetition. “I’m twelve years old!” I said, with a light giggle, “Like, for the whole weekend!” Happy, Kate . . .?

Apparently, so. At least, her smile was a lot bigger than mine as she gave my shoulder a comforting squeeze. “Isn’t she SO cute?” Kate asked.

“Definitely,” Aunt Miranda nodded, “Your sister is quite the impressive actress.”

“She is, isn’t she? Maybe you should join Fraser’s drama club when you start there this fall. Wouldn’t that be fun, Annie?”

“Mm hmm! Super fun,” I replied.

Because in this false reality, I didn’t get the dignity of even attending the middle school I had left years ago. Instead, I was a rising 6th grader. Great.

Kate’s arrival pretty much killed any chances I had of sorting this out with our aunt. I had already verbally signed up for more pull-ups in the name of avoiding humiliation, and now I was doing the same thing with my silence. By not directly denying Kate’s story about this being some kind of experiment, I was more or less allowing it to continue. There were probably better options, and yet I felt so limited.

My sister walked me out of the kitchen a minute or two later, with a quiet reminder about what was on the line as we made our way to the garage. She had me simply stand there and smile while she looked around the back corner. “Found it!” she exclaimed. Pulling something out of a cluttered mess of boxes and bins, my eyes widened when she lifted it from the makeshift storage area. A fucking carseat. “Luna said they keep it around for when they babysit and need to leave the house or whatever.”

“I don’t need that, Kate!” I snapped. At the last second, I was able to contort my face into the fake expression that was turning into my ‘home base’ in terms of how I presented myself to her and the twins. Because of it, my protest likely lost a good bit of its strength as Kate walked back over, but I persisted nonetheless with the ‘younger sister’ attitude. “Like, I’m tall enough, I mean. That’s, like, so extra!”

“Better safe than sorry, Annie!” Kate winked, “Besides, the laws here are different state to state. I’d hate for our cousins to get in trouble because of you. They just got their driver’s licenses, remember?”

“But, like-”

“No buts, little sis! Wait right there. Actually, how old are you?”

“I’m twelve years old!” I responded, with a reflexive giggle.

“That’s a good girl,” Kate smirked, “Now wait right there, okay?” I did as I was told, awkwardly shifting my weight from foot to foot and shivering a bit from the coolness of the garage. Taking her sweet time, either on purpose to make me uncomfortable or maybe because it had been a while since Kate had to figure one of these things out, she finally stepped back from the car and gestured to the carseat. “Done! Get in, Annie. Luna and Lilah are changing; they’ll be down any second.”

As in, I could choose between already being in the carseat when they joined us, or deal with the embarrassment of getting into it while they watched. Of course, Kate wasn’t going to make it easy. The moment I began climbing into the car, I felt her hands on me. Pushing and manhandling my body this way and that, she ‘helped’ me into the car and manipulated my body so I was jarringly pivoted forward by her hands and then pulled backwards onto the seat. “Kate, don’t-” I began saying, but it was too late. With the help of gravity and my sister’s harsh tugging, I landed squarely on the mess that had caused a disgusting sag of the pull-ups pretty much the whole time I was on my feet. The awful mess simultaneously spread all over my rear and also pushed UP into me between my cheeks thanks to how I had fallen onto it. Gasping and slightly whimpering before I could cut off the pathetic sound, I immediately tried to adjust and somehow make things more comfortable beneath me. If that was even possible.

“Ah, ah!” Kate snapped. She stepped forward and leaned into the car, placing both of her hands on my shoulders. Her face ended up inches from mine, and she looked me right in the eyes. “It’s your fault you’re wearing shitty pull-ups, Annie. Remember that. You couldn’t wait all of thirty minutes in the car, and you clearly used my little joke as an excuse to finish the job. Now you’re going to have to deal with the consequences of your actions.”

I blushed deeply at the accusation. She was leaving so much out! Like the fact that I chugged all that water, and how the pacifier rule meant that I couldn’t express how badly I needed to go. And Kate had seemed so serious when she threatened to tell our parents if I didn’t do . . . that. This wasn’t me. It wasn’t! It was her. “Kate-”

“Hush, little Annie,” she said. Placing a finger on my lips, and keeping her other hand firmly on my shoulder, she kept the intense eye contact up. “Did you wet your pull-ups? Yes, or no?”

Nervously glancing away, I simply nodded my head. This wasn’t fair, making it a yes or no question, but I was too caught off guard by the gross sensations in the bulky underwear and Kate’s confrontation at the same time.

“And you did more than that in your pull-ups, didn’t you?”

Again, I nodded.

“That’s what I thought. So, whose fault is it, Annie?” she took her finger away from my lips.

I knew what I wanted to say. It was Kate’s fault. EVERYTHING was her fault. The pull-up dare in the first place, the lemonade, the pacifier, the water. Both ‘accidents’ in the car and everything that had pushed me into the tween role I had been playing since we arrived. But that same doubt from before was creeping in–how I was the older girl, the more mature girl, and yet I had allowed all of this to happen to myself. And then, on top of that, Kate was a bit intimidating at the moment, and I felt a little too scared to point the finger at her.

So, making yet another bad choice in a never ending string of bad choices, I muttered, “Mine . . .”

“What was that, Annie?” Kate asked, “And don’t forget to smile, little sis.”

Part 35

It took a minute of back and forth before Kate was satisfied with my answer.

By the end of it, I was blushing up a storm and actually somewhat convinced that she was right. It’s not like she made me use the pull-ups. In a way, a lot of this was my fault, even though my younger sister was the one who more or less set me up. After all, what nineteen year old girl can’t hold her bladder? In retrospect, there were a lot of things I could have done differently.

“And would you rather be a nineteen year old girl who shit her pull-ups?” Kate asked, “Or would you rather be twelve years old?”

Nervously giggling, more in the habit after Kate harped on it throughout our little chat, I answered without hesitation. “I’d rather be twelve.” Neither options were great, but the latter felt like the more acceptable choice.

“Mm hmm. My twelve year old little sister,” Kate smiled. It was almost a more affectionate expression than anything else, but I knew her better than that. Her eyes gave away how much she was actually enjoying this. “Now, I think-” Before she could finish that thought, the hallway door behind her opened and the voices of the chattering twins filled the garage. “Later, then,” Kate said. She kissed me on the cheek and grabbed the base of the shortalls to give one more warning rub of the pull-ups through them, “Be good, Annie. Smile and giggle!” Then she stepped back and shut the car door on me.

For once, I was actually grateful for the childish outfit. If I still had my skirt on, I could only imagine how it would ride up in the car seat. The double pull-ups had already threatened to poke out earlier, especially after my accident. Accidents, plural, if I was counting the more mortifying one. I had managed to keep things hidden so far, but the awkward seat I was currently strapped into would have made things difficult.

I assumed the arrival of the other girls meant we’d be heading out right away. While I wasn’t particularly enthused at the thought of playing mini golf as a ‘tween,’ I also wanted to get this humiliating day over and done with. And maybe this was Kate’s plan anyway–get us out of the house, where it would be easier to dispose of my pull-ups–provided I could keep up the bubbly attitude she was insisting on, of course. Instead of getting in the car, however, Kate beckoned the girls over to her and circled up with them for a minute. It was impossible to hear anything through the car window and their quiet voices, but I was self conscious enough about my current appearance and situation to immediately guess that I was the subject of their conversation. Especially when Luna looked in my direction for a moment with a curious look.

Finally, they broke up their little huddle and came to get in the car. Kate sat in the other middle seat, no doubt to keep an eye on me, and the twins hopped in the front. “Ready to go, Annie?” Lilah asked. From the driver’s seat, she glanced over her shoulder with a smile, “How’s your car seat?”

My pull-ups. My car seat. “It’s, like, SO embarrassing,” I giggled. Definitely the truth, but maybe not so bad if I played it off. “You sure it’s the law?” She would know better than Kate, after all.

“Mm hmm!” she replied, “Well, I can’t remember the exact height. But what if we get pulled over? Better to be safe!” As if that was that, she turned the key in the ignition and opened the garage door behind us with the push of a button.

Luna tagged in right away after buckling in. “So what else do you have planned for the summer, Annie?”

My face flushed at the unexpected question. What was I supposed to say to that? I mentally began grasping for the kinds of things I used to do over summer break when I was younger, but it was all such a blur. Sleepovers, and hanging out at the pool, and the occasional trip? The real answer was ‘find a summer job,’ but that was what nineteen year old Annelise would say. And I wasn’t her at the moment. “Umm . . . “ Feeling like a fish out of water, I turned to Kate for help.

“Aside from orientation in a couple months? Like, nothing! Well, nothing official. Just hanging out with her little friends!”

“Oh, Annie!” Luna exclaimed, “You should totally go to camp with us. I mean, not with us. Lilah and I will be counselors. But you could be a camper! Oh my God, it would be so much fun. Have you ever done summer camp before?”

Yes. A couple times, but I was still figuring out how to balance my fake life against my real one. “Uh, yeah,” I muttered. Belatedly remembering to push a smile on my face, I added, “Last summer! It was fine.”

Kate scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Come on, that doesn’t count. It was a day camp! This is real camp, Annie. Like, cabins and bunk beds. Right, Luna?”

“Yeah! Maybe there’s a bed left? Registration is technically closed, but Lilah and I have some pull. I could text one of the head counselors! It’s a little spendy, but I’m sure we could figure that out, too.”

“You really don’t have to . . . ” I said. Kate and I were just here for the weekend. It wouldn’t make any sense to put the twins through that kind of trouble when I was actually too old to be a camper OR a counselor.

“Annie, you don’t want to go to camp?” Kate asked. When her voice drew my gaze, she narrowed her eyes for a split second before softening her expression. “Why not?”

Luna didn’t seem to catch the fleeting threat meant just for me, and Lilah was focusing on the road at this point. What did Kate want me to say? It’s not like this was actually going to happen, but I also didn’t want our cousins to go through any trouble for no reason. “Because we’re leaving on Monday,” I said, opting to answer her second question rather than the first one. That was the schedule last I heard–our parents would pick us up that morning, and camp must be the commitment the twins had that made this weekend ideal for a visit.

“But if you could stay?” Kate pushed, “And if there was room for you to register late?”

She was just testing me. Last I checked, camps with cabins had a cut-off in terms of attendance due to the limited number of beds. If registration was over, then all the spots were filled. “Sure!” I exclaimed, finding it easier to meet Luna’s eyes than Kate’s. With a giggle and a nervous twirl of my left braid, I clarified, “Like, if my parents approve. And if you can, you know-”

“I’ll see what I can do!” Luna winked, “Well, what Lilah can do. She’s better at sweet talking than I am.”

“Your twin powers aren’t the same?” Kate teased.

“We’re Yin and Yang,” Lilah said to the rearview mirror, “And I’ll see what I can do for my favorite new camper!”

All I could manage was a grateful smile that faded just a bit once Lilah was paying attention to driving again. But when Kate reached over and sharply pinched my thigh, I squeaked and slapped her hand away, only barely managing to turn the girly sound into another giggle before Luna turned back around. “Like, you’re the best!” I managed to get out. Resisting the urge to shoot Kate a glare, I instead kept up the awkward grin for the twin in the passenger seat. “So, like, what kind of camp is it?”

That seemed to be enough to keep Luna’s attention, which meant Kate couldn’t do something like that again. Or worse, considering her antics where my pull-ups were involved.

The short haired twin was happy to launch into a description of the camp she had apparently been a camper for as well before going back as a counselor once she had aged out. In general, it sounded like my nightmare. As a girl who enjoyed the indoors–particularly with good AC in the summer–and academics, an outdoorsy camp didn’t appeal to me in the slightest. Even if I could be a counselor, considering my college age, I’d much prefer working at the mall or pretty much anywhere else.

Thankfully, the uncomfortable projections of attending a summer camp were interrupted when Lilah exclaimed, “We’re here!”

Suddenly, I was grateful that it was time to play mini golf. And one step closer to getting out of this mess and putting an end to the degrading facade.

Of course, Kate wouldn’t make it that easy. “Why don’t you two go ahead?” she suggested, “I’ll help Annie with her car seat!”

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The Business Trip, Chapters 1-10